SinGAPOre'S SwEEThearT!

2006-10-31T13:24:00.000+08:00

its been a week into raya oreadi....weeeeeeeeee! n yes ppl raya 2006 is the best eva coz i have my dearie crazie hubby wit me this year...hahaha...he lights up my life indeed...oh yeah before i forget...selamat hari raya ppl...!!! oh im not done with visiting yet will only do it this coming weekend...yesh!!!! hahahaha....

n yest was wierd indeed...hmmmmmm!!! is this world that small ?? hahaha weird!!

2006-10-15T13:32:00.000+08:00

at werk on a sundae...werking pm shift...to add things worse my partner is on a mc hence i gottta to drag my dae alone...n yes the comp is still lying dead at hm...baby how come u never seems to take my hints?

latest development frm work..dayah is resigning..in fact her last dae will be on the 19th...we all will lose a good fren a werking partner...tho i mite not be close to her she will still be missed...honestly shes a good person..the most matured person i ever knw ...anw gerl wanna wish u all the best for ur future...

im still counting dwn the days here at my workplace...im quite done with werking here...the werk environment is fine but not the ppl...honestly the reason y im still here is becoz im after the damn company bonus...im just idling here for that cash....if not for the bike money i would prolly start looking for other jobs as well....yes u damn money i need ya in my fucking bank acc n i finally can have a bike on my own...damn cant wait for that....n im still wondering what i gonna do next after i quit here...oh well munchkinz y dun u think of that for me k...can i just stay at hm n do tai-tais thingy like having my manicure done weekly...shopping spree...that is a faboulous life indeed! i will definitely do all that when my bank acc is fucking fat!!

2006-10-10T11:14:00.000+08:00

the comp at hm is still lying dead...yes baby i need u to get it kicking an alive soon..ur soon never seems to come ...finally can find some time to blog miss bloggie..cmon stop complaining...been bz at werk u knw....attending to all this idiots ...anw i went to the bazaar the other day in the hope of finding my baju raya...its a saturday n yeah lots of YPs...gosh...a clutter of them everywhere....n how the hell am i going to find my stuffs..anw had a great week wit u bambam...yeah minus the cranky quarrels whatsoever....like i sae love me for who i am...hey im trying to change u knw...i dun knw whether im even close to trying ...oh well...baby i just love being myself so y would i need to change rite? ok maybe cut dwm the temper n curb my ego a lil bit for ya orite munch?? i try ok...i will....

2 more weeks left before hari raya..oh my time do flies tat fast huh..im excited...i got to spend raya wit someone new this year..hahaha...it has never been tat exciting before but im sure it will be a blast this year...i wanna a bike ASAP....it will be fucking cool to have a bike on our own..yes this time round i have a say in the bike...no nonsense whatever....baby go get the license done quickly orite munch...oh well i will fucking wait for it ......damn damn damn!!!!

i still like that mango top baby...its irritating not being able to get something which i want...shitass ...the departed n wtc looks cool...i got to watch tat...n theres my fav hugh jackman this mnth...scoop...ahh that hunky fella...i dig him lot..ok cut the crap got to go...

u have been a great company once again miss bloggie...n yeah baby when can i finally gv u a ride? oh cmon dun tell m e u dun need one too? hehehehehe...

2006-10-05T11:48:00.000+08:00

been trying to blog since the other dae at hm but the comp simply wont work...yeah daddy will ya like buy ur lil gerl here a new comp? it doesnt cost that much u knw dear dad...hahahha! hnmmm...yes miss bloggie...i miss ya...hahah...sorry didnt blog religiously i forgot bt ya...but hey im here aite...so i will blog more often orite so dun be a complainer like i am...sp what have i been up to? hmmmmm...lets see...nothing much i suppose...routine stuffs daily..werk hm him , werk hm him..yes ppl i need a life! an interesting one at that....i just aint have enuf to supplement the kind of life that i want but hey im still pretty much happy with what i have...its the fasting mnth oreddi...yeah! yes its been that fast...a week into the fasting to be exact so tat leaves me a mere 3 weeks for raya..yes that dreadful occasion..n yes ppl bratman didnt actually go missing this fasting season hhahah...i`ve got him with me...in fact i`ve got him wrapped under my arms...yeah im the control queen in the relationship..so what huh?? im happy being that way as a matter of fact i dun think its wrong being like that...envy me? pls dont..just go find urselves a guy like him ..just keep ur hands of mine ..thnk you very much! i love ya darling bushuk! hehehehe...

raya this year sounds fun...together with him...we shall see how it goes aite n i will update more bt it when raya is finally here..have yet to go to bazaar geylang...yes munchkinz pls go there wit me...i`ve nt had enuff fill of deng deng yet u knw...heheheh....n yes munch have i tell u that u look hot in that new raya outfit of urs? hehhehe...

so here we are..still very much in love wit each other..im counting my blessings..im just happy being wit him...he still makes my heart skips a beat when he says i love you....i will still miss him even if we just part 5 mins ago..n yes i still get excited when he kiss n hug me...just like before...i love u baby ..i relly do..pardon me for my cranky moods at times..hahaha..i dun knw y but i just have to throw tantrums when i dun get enuff attention...im a prissy princess remember? in case u forgot darling...hehehehe...n darlin fret not orite..i promised things will still be as smooth as we r rite now...with or without intervenve frm some ppl here...hahahah...cmon baby trust me...u r ard to guide me im sure i wont let history repeats itself again...

we got lots of occasions coming up munchkins...cant wait for our one year anni...weeeee! that anniversary of ours will just make me sit dwn n reflect on what we have achieve this past one year...im glad that we have come this far...i love ya baby...n stop driving me nuts for heaven sake! hehehehe...

n dear mr watever pls stop whatever nonsense u have in ur head..its not going to work...boy trust me i never meant to crush ur world and i never thought i would see the day we grew apart...i hope u stop living in denial...pretending that we got along...boy how u not gonna see that? just listen to ur heart u know we have to be apart n there nothing u can do to make things rite again..ive moved on...i really dont feel the same i once felt for you...dont u get it?

n yeah im still piss wit my fren so whatever...if u want my frenship do the things according to my way at least once orite...y oh y am i being surrounded by ppl who dont live up to my way?? full of junkies..idiots...n yeah mom im piss wit u too...stop breathing dwn on my neck...im fucking 20 stop dictating what i shld do n not...

till another dae miss bloggie..u have been a great company at werk...

2006-07-14T17:22:00.000+08:00

2 entries in a dae...just an hour apart...i just feel that i have to write this one down...not becoz im bored but becoz i believe it will act as a gentle reminder for me...n i decided to walk down the memory lane n list all those happy moments i have wit him...so here goes...

last year sometime in june stumble upon someone so funny over the chat room...i wonder to myself...` hey there r actually sane ppl in chatrooms i tot most r perverts! `
a beautiful frenship starts frm there on where we bond over late nite msn...
as time goes by we grew closer even tho no contacts were made whatsoever..
got so comfortable wit each other that we start calling each other mushy pet names..n we were just frens..
we were still just frens..
still very much just good frens
until the dae my fren went missing...
then i start to realise that i miss him terribly...i start to realise that im very dependent on our virtual frenship...i start to get afraid that he mite just be those one off kind of frens..
so i dutifully waited becoz i know he wont break his promise...
true enuff he came back...from there sparks flew i guess...what i feel he felt it too..it can never get any better than that
then the smses of i love u n i miss u came...mind u we were just frens..just fren indeed
the crucial dae on 26 nov 2006..where he told me this `that dae is tonite dear`
that place where we have our ice cream wit no sudu kayu..that first kiss we shared..that hugging..that peck on his forehead..that holding of hands...yeah frens do all that nowadays...hmmmm!
christmas day..exchange of chocolates...feed each other wif chocs...
first mnth anni..exchanging of gifts...a promise rings frm perlini silver and a couple red adidas watch
new year eve celebration..gulp dwn liquor...ate takeaway subway sandwich in a corner of raffles place subway..
a mellow 2nd mnth anni...gobble dwn pasta at grillers..wow tat place is thumbs up
bring him hm to granny hse for housewarming
3rd mnth anni watch him play soccer
got my sunburnt at the 5 a side hyundai soccer tournament...it was cool nonetheless
starts to cook for me more religiously on my off days...my fav dish ? pasta n anything to do wif chicken
4 mnths anni...watch the hills have eyes n paid 32 bucks for movie seats..yeah we r that crazee
5 mnths anni? im sori dear i really dun remember what we do on that dae...hahha..pls help me to recollect it orite..
finally he got a new haircut after being nagged frm me consistently
bought me a fox tshirt n a new adidas bag
my big dae...2nd may..went to search for our first ever couple hp 6111 which was never meant to be coz it only lasted a week...we were like mad cows i swear
then came the other kenduri which is at grandpa hse...they all loves him..im glad
he bring me to the airport so that i can try popeyes chick....of coz i love them its chck what do u expect? nvm if its at the other end of the country
remember u wore formal attire that dae?have i told u tat u look really hot in that black shirt wit ur red tie..so full of charm...
ok here comes our 6 mnths anni....get ready...get down n dirt wif our hands...wif chickens n prawns...heheehehe...what do u expect huh?
try out the new cool place cathay cineplex n watch x men
watch the world cup opening together n there starts my funny antics of making u go hm late by asking to sleep at the last hour
yeah not forgetting picking up betting skills frm him..made decent amount of money so far
7 mnths anni? hmmmm...did we even do anyhing special ?actually i just cant remember..
catch the world cup finals together..eating macdonalds...shld shoot ourselves for not getting the hotline num rite...yeah we still laugh bt that whenever we see that big M word...
8 mnths anni...have yet to come....still counting ....

at the end of the dae...i just hope i will be able to do this over n over again..jotting dwn all those happy moments...frm now tomorrow n forever..i certainly hope so...god bless...its been a wonderful journey n i thank u for that baby for being a part of that journey with me here...

2006-07-14T16:36:00.000+08:00

ok so here i am again but not wif happy stories to share...had yet another quarrel yesterdae...the crux of the quarrel? no prize for guessing it rite...yes its the same damn thing again..me nt being open enuf bout my male frens or rather whoever guy frens i have in life...how do u expect me to be more open bt them when all the time the only impression that u give me was u r still not comfortable knowing tat at ties i do have contacts wif them.......i dun knw if we can ever come to a agreement regarding that matter...i absolutely have no idea...who says having a quarrel wif u was easy? do u honestly think i like being like that...so distant frm each other that i cant even feel the warmth frm u...to be honest i am really tired of arguments...n last nite it just come to a point where i have to tell myself that i have to get numb to things...u knw sometimes when something happens over n over again u just dun show any reaction or emotions simply becoz u dun feel anything to it...n when we start showing signs of not reacting animore it boils down to immunity...n i always pray hard that i wouldnt even come close to that behaviour...sadly whatever is written all over my face last nite was tiredness...yes i badly wanna scream my heart out n beg u to just leave me alone...leave me to fend for myself...leave me so that i can have time on my own..leave me so that i can heal myself...leave me so that i can be selfish n convinced myself that im better off alone...honestly i dun know how something i consider so pure turns out to be this bad...was it really tat bad? i dun knw...no answer for that...

the only thing that is holding me back frm saying all those straight to u is very simple...i know if i push u away i may never get to see u animore..ever...im afraid of that...im afraid that i mite just have to wake up the next morning having to face the fact that u r no longer in my life...yes im afraid...truly afraid..n im glad i do still have that fear in me despite the quarrels becoz i know one thing haven changed...that is the feelings i have towards u ...i dun deny that i alway feel tired every time we have a heated exchange of words..i hate to feel that way too...like they say an idle mind is the devils playground...when i try to stop thinking all those nasty thoughts starts to creep in...

jufri...u know for a fact i cant leave u alone to fend for urself...u know i dun have the heart to do that...i never want u to go back to that old world of urs where u just shun urself away frm the rest of the people who cares bt u...u know u r never alone in this world...u know u r cut out to be someone...someone who can bring me happiness...y do u even have that doubts in urself? y do u have to bring urself down so badly...i love u for who u are n i hope u stays the same way...the reason y im here wif u frm the very beginning is ur ability to make me see that all is not lost yet in this world...u r special in ur very own way...n i really appreciate u being just urself....

we all have an ugly past..who doesnt....u have ur own set of past n i have my own set too...dont u remember the reason y u r here in this relationship? its becoz u finally r able to let go of ur past n venture on something fresh...a new chapter in ur life...would u rather choose that route again?giving up on urself n sinks in despair ? wasnt it enuff for you to have a taste of all that once ? do u still need another dose of that same harsh treatment? i know i can never totally let go of all the quarrels just like that..but eventually i will just let everything go slowly...u just have to give me more time..

i cant tell u enuff how sincerely sorry i am towards u...i guess words cant make up for what has happen...i still stand by what i always tell u...that i will always love u as i have frm the start...u r the best thing that ever happen in my life ...i wont have any regrets having u in my life...i hope things would heal totally one dae...im not sure but im still keeping my faith on that...

2006-07-13T00:06:00.000+08:00

okae lets see...the last entry was like 2 mnths back...the reason y im back blogging is becoz ppl at my werkplace r goin ga ga over blogging...n it just occurs to me that i have a blog on my own..n so i hope frm now on i will start to blog more religiously...updating all the latest news...hahahaha...

read a blog from a dear fren of mine at werk....i agree wit what she said..its true tat at times we r too caught up wit our daily lives tat at times we failed to stop n think what would happen if the ones that r dear to us r not there animore for us? as i were on my way hm in the train listening to that amanda perez song i pray...the only person that stays in my head was him...yes its him...i asked myself this...have i took things for granted? have i ever step over the edge? what would happen if he`s not in my life animore or rather if i never ever get to know someone like him? then all those flashes of my past just keeps running in my head...hahaha...see what boredom in the train can do to ur brain??it just freeze ur brain so bad like u just finish slurping slurpee.....huh? oh whatever...im getting crazee....first foremost i gonna start wit the ppl that r dear in my life at the present...

to him...my present beloved hubby im known as nur....when it comes to him i never wanna be known as liza...to me being called liza from him is like mentioning a taboo subject that can causes riot....yeah each time u calls me that i really feel like skinning u alive n infest u wit all those huge big ants.hahahha...kidding...im so not proud of the past that is associated with liza...i can safely sae at this point of time im still ashamed to let him know the finer details of my past...its something which i rather keep to myself n make it low profile...the minute im with him im no longer the person that i was last time...im no longer the liza that many ppl know back then...when it comes to him i really try my darndest best to leave those things behind...closing that dark chapter of my life n starting a new page all over again...yes baby in ur eyes i only wish to be called nur...coz the only ppl who knows me by that r the ones who r dear in my heart...n you belonged to that category...n when we do quarrel pls just hold back ur words n stop calling me that orite munch... n yeah munch regarding the last quarrel we had dated 7 july 2006...the only thing that stuck in my head was when u said im beginning to hate myself becoz of u...those words keeps lingering over n over again...i didnt know i could push u that far...its really sad hearing that coming frm ur mouth...i dun wish to go any further...

n to my beloved mom...yes tho u do irritate the shit out of me...i know i did let u dwn...to be exact of the actions that i did 3 years back...i still remember the time when u cried ...u were filled wit disappointment...as u held back ur tears u told me this...u r getting older...i cant stop u frm what u wanna do as long as u dun have regrets later on...n being the stubborn gal i am i retorted back by saying dun worry even if i do have regrets i will face it myself...yeah such arrogance frm someone who is only 17...being exposed to much of the outside life...as the malay phrase goes...`mcm rusa masok kampong`..hahaha....cheh....yeah basically i was like that...i enjoyed too much being wilful that i even forgot to fulfill the basic duties of a daughter ...yes i simply neglected all that becoz of the resentment i had towards my family...i wasnt being rational at all...i tot it was `cool` to stand up for the things on my own..like throwing my future away just like that by giving up on my studies coz i know by doing that i can get even wit my mom...yeah 3 years later i finally realise what she meant when she sae i shld not have any regrets later on...mom i really regretted all those...i regretted not heeding ur advise...i failed to realise that whatever u tried to do back then was for the better for me...i hate it a lot for blaming u n dad for all the things that had happened...i know i have no control over those things then n the least that i can do for you was to stop being wilful in thus making u worried to a point where u really felt like giving up on me...im really glad u didnt mom....coz if u do i dun know how much further i will stray...i dun even know whether i can become half the way i am now...i dun even know whether i can come back to the right path...3 years seems short but trust me lots of things could have been avoided within those years...im only 20 now...i cant sae that i have fully grown up but i have to admit age does plays a big factor the way i am now...age is really catching up on me......i really cant see myself going out all nite long...wasting time drinking in clubs ...dancing at the dancefloor....being filthy flirty...not knowing how to be reserve....yeah i just cant have that raw energy n pace rite now in my life...theres a phrase for footballers where they say its time they hang up their boots...while for me maybe the phrase will be its time i hang up those heels or wait a min maybe those tops...hahhaha....yeah im getting old...all those r only for youngsters...i got better things to do nowadays like riding my cute lil pony...hahhaha....if u knw wat i mean munch? btw munch sex was at its brilliance...oh cmon i just got to spit that out....

life has become a mellow thing for me know...im not complaining..in fact im at peace wit myself...im happily attached to the one i dearly love n treasure...hes my joker...my entertainer...my lover...my best fren...my arch enemy...my soulmate...yeah hes everything that i ever asked for...i know i cant do anything without him...yes munch u r one of that driving factor y i decided to turn things ard in my life...honestly im glad u came into my life at a point where i was dwn and out...where i need a reason to believe that all is not lost yet...n im glad i listened to my heart for giving us a chance to become a part of each other`s life....i love u lots baby...i really do...for everything that u have done for me i appreciate it alot...

` how can u hold on to someone whom u never met?`

a phrase frm tat movie...an exact sentiment which i believe we both can relate to...

adious...shall blog again some time soon...nites nites....muackzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2006-05-10T10:37:00.000+08:00

check out the last entry??? its like in march...darn...haven been updating here for a very long time...ohh well during the disappearance so much has happened lately...the good...the bad...the ugly...anw im oredi 20 oredi now...hahaha...this year bdae is superb even tho it wasnt exactly such a big bang...it was a very simple occasion...had seafood for dinner wit baby n my bestie....the only difference that is significant this year i spent it wit my two best frens n my first bdae wit him...yeah...tats the diff...i dun usually spent bdaes wit my besties have always spent it wit those bunch of `people`... so this year is extra special for me...really heart those two besties of mine...i love u two gerls no matter what...just cant do without them...n yes not forgetting my dearie hubby...i love u a lot b...thnks for bein there wit me...really love that nite a lot...will spend every single bdae of mine wif ya every year okay b..promise me? n yeah not forgettin in the aftn on my bdae...scout ard to sell my old hp at a good price...frm jurong east all the way up to outram then back dwn to jurong east again..hmm...we can work together aqfter all b...see im not that whiney after all u knw...we bopught ourselves a couple hp...nokia 6111..his black mine pink as usual...but u knw wat...the phone only lasted for a week to be exact..heheh...there goes our first ever couple phone...coz we r selling that off to get a new n70...hehehe...that hp will be awesome...i hope i will settle for that n70 for at least bt 6 mnths...i hope i will b...hehehe...cant wait to use that hp...will be so cool having that same phone...lets just wait n see ok....

hmm....i rather mention the happy events here than the painful ones....i dun wish to get there anw...trying so hard to let everything go...trying so hard not to let the words that i said to stop haunting me...its hard but i gotta try...really wish i can mellow dwn a bit...cant go on forever behaving like this...i will shun those who r dear to me away if i dun stop...the last thing i wanna see is seeing them walk away frm me...i dun wish to let tat happen animore...i do not want a repeat of history..seeing someone who is dear to u walked away frm ur life is difficult...it was never easy...it never did for me...never did...not a single bit...n for me to digest what was being told straight to my face is another difficulty ...no i couldnt accept those reasons...that was just a biased judgement of me ...i wasnt even given a chance to explain myself or the very least redeem myself...it was nt entirely my fault..i know it wasnt...stop making me out as if im always the bad one...that i cum n go just like that...i`ve heard enuff n i`ve seen enuff....stop going n tell me that ` u r not the person i used to know`..pls dun..really...coz honestly im so sick of hearing that...i was just trying my darndest best to be myself here...i am who i am..i cant make myself to be someone whom im not..i dun like to be compare wif the other gerls out there...im not like them...i know im not...im just different..n if u fucking bastards wanna leave stop saying i`ve found someone better`...coz at the end of it all i think its just plain bullshit...really...

n baby i knw i drive u really nuts every time im having my mood swings...im sorry b..but u must know that i love u always...quarrels or no quarrels...i need u in my life...always....pls place a lil bit of faith in me...i know i can do it..i know we can get sumewhere if we really try hard enuff...i know we can...too much is at at stake..i dun wish to lose all that...i love u b...always...

2006-03-22T20:50:00.000+08:00

i cant get thru my baby...ohh well...mite as well blog while waiting for him to gv me a kol ltr...okay darling i absolutely love ur recent blog...its cute...really like the last part supa lots...hehehehe...yup its true gonna be our 4mnths soon in a matter of 4 daes...cant believe it rite darling...our first meeting is very much still fresh in my mind...that nite ..that place..that holding of hands...gosh 26 11 05 really felt just like yesterdae...a major significant moment in my life...without that meeting i prolly wont be here wit u..wont be calling u names...wont be having fun wit ya..wont be having quarrels wit ya...hehehehe...i love ya lots darling each n every day...as much as u cant live without me its the same for me too..every bit of my heart belongs to u baby..no one gets me the way u do darling..

all those things u said to me...
all those things we chatted bt in msn...
is very much in ma head...remember the first time when u told me u love me over the sms?
do u know the joy that it brings...tho i cant hear it for myself frm ur mouth...
i know u mean everybit of it...i trust u...
n so that very words frm u helps me get thru life...
coz i know i have a purpose in life...something for me to look forward to...

` Guess whos back....back again....Bratman's back....tell your frens...HAHAHA.....bratman has finally landed back to tis sanctuary to find his one an only bratgerl!First of all....i would like to say....Selamat Hari Raya!(altho a bit late bt hey Hari Raya's one month long u noe)...n yeah my apologies for disappearing without a trace(lucky u didnt file a missing persons report to da police)....btw....i wan green packets u noe.....many many k!Secondly,i want to tell u...tat.....I I REALLY REALLY MISS U ALOT!....its been so long.....so here i am...back to stay...to keep my one n only promise to you....(hey thankx for waiting for me dear)Finally,i still wana see you in baju raya u noe!u owe me a pict u noe....hehehe `

remember that honey?? i know i kept telling u how much i love that testi frm urs...but baby i just cant help myself...whenever i miss ya i will always read thru this particular testi frm ya...it really means a lot to me...when i sae a lot it really is a lot...n up till now even if i read it like a gazillion times it does cause a stir in my heart...hahha...i dun knw y...but it would really make me just sit dwn n reflect back on all those we have shared....n at times i still cant get this..
what kind of frenship we were sharing then?? to get far to this stage is even more unbelieveble...i mean does all that actually happen? finding ur true companion in the virtual land?? it just amazes me so much such stuffs do happen in real life...n i tot u can only find that in the movies...oh well movies r reflection of life itself aniwae...

n baby dun be arrogant here okay...

u cant eat proper for nuts without me ard...
no one can stand ur fart the way i do..
no one gonna hug u when ur all sweaty the way i do..
no one gonna watch u doin ur own `mtv` the way i do...
no one gonna say anithing when u scratch ur balls the way i do...

u shit stick mayburry ass reject...get that in ur head? im not the only one wit flaws orite..u too shit smear...hehehe...
i love ya lots u knw...muackzzzzzzzzzz

2006-03-22T03:41:00.000+08:00

Orite tis took a long time i noe....hehehe.......aniwae ma apologies first....baby...i noe i shud be sleepin bt i really cant coz i got a terrible headache n ma fuckin tooth hurts like hell n its fuckin bleeding...i go to bed after tis...

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Rite.....been tryin to log in n blog....but miss bloggie woggie juz wudnt work for me rite...hehe....bt aniwae now dat im here well heres da chance ive been waitin for so long....hehehe....

Yeap....we'r exactly 4 daes awae from 4 mths anniversary...gosh wen i tink of how fast time actually flies...fuck it really does give me da creeps of da creeps......da very first date seems only like last week...so fresh in ma head....n suddenly wen i look forward......its going to be 4 mths?????gosh....sumtimes i wonder...."man u gota be kidding me....its been fuckin four mths???holy shit-smear(yeah dats a new word)...."

Freaky really freaky how fast time really flies....heheh.....cant believe it.....bt da only ing dat keeps me aware of time is dat organizer...every daily detail is thr...so kinda tell me how far alon we haf cum....darn shit...hehehe.....so far away...n in two months...it wud be half a yr...gosh....

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Well its been great tis past few daes.....so much happiness albeit tat shit ass 2 daes lasat week....well 1 tings for sure now dat i realise is dat...quarrels?are 1 fuckin tiring n draining ting...yeah...wen it cums to tis...im slow....4 mths on after quarrels...now i cum to realise hw fuckin tiring it was...bt i guess....quarrel itself is a measure...of human strength....n most importantly...da strength of a relationship.....hw many times will u pull urself up wen ur down???u prolly do it like 5 times before u give up...well...not for us..baby...hw many time shaf we gone to hell n cum back??i dun remember....haha.....well.....for me....tis relationship....is juz too much to let a quarrel break da whole ting up...n no matter wat it is...da tot of not having u in my life animore is enuff to drah ma sick ass all ova singapore....from east to central to da north west...heheh....i chase u...i will....whereava u go....coz i'll nvr let u go.....i 'll nvr will........

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I wun.....n i nvr will let u go baby....no matter wat da case is....im here to stay....ups or down....trust me baby....im not gona let u go no matter wat....im here....im here to stay......

Gosh.....hw can i let u go.....u prolly get lost in city hall itself eventho u work thr....
Gosh.....hw can i let u go.....u cant even cook for urself...
Gosh.....hw can i let u go.....u cant even pronounce carls/charles properly...
Gosh.....hw can i let u go.....u dun even noe wat ur doing or tokin abt at times...

At da end of da dae...baby.....i juz cant let u go.....

I love u baby....i oways will......with all ma heart....Muackzzzzzz

2006-03-17T15:52:00.000+08:00

not complaining indeed...great ...go on then...dun complain...be the good guy here...n i as usual will end up looking being the unreasonable one here...great...fucking great indeed...see the world the same way as i do? now...can u? can u really? im asking u rite now? can u?....fucking utter bullshit....crap....hark....im so tired...i dun believe it a single bit when u keep assuring me tat u r nt tired of all the quarrels....who r u kidding here? alot has been said between us but i doubt the crux of the matter has actually been solved...if it was y r we here now having a cold war again? or wait a min...like u told me just now...maybe the problem lies wit me after all....that im never happy for everything tat u have done for me...yeah maybe i shld just remind myself that in this relationship u have never been the one who blows hot n cold ...it has always been me..me...me...me...me....yeah i am the unreasonable one always...so much for being on the same page...indeed...fucking shit....i wonder what is the real problem wit us at times? n i wonder what the hell do i want from u at times....im not that unfeeling after all for ur info....i do feel shit every time we quarrel...it hurts where it hurts most.....y is it that i can never do the right things when u claim im gd enuff for ya?? what happens when there r signs around us warning us..but we refuse to take that becoz deep down inside...we wanna believe theres hope...we wanna believe hurt doesnt exist...what if i told u what i fear the most might come true becoz of all the things that happened the same...? what if i told u i think bout my fear all the time becoz it happened to me once before...?what if the sun stops shining n rain starts falling n the things that i feared most come true eventually...? am i preparing or am i just being paranoid? the truth is...i do care bout u okay...really would hurt if anithing were to happen to u...i do care bout our relationship...i do care bout ur feelings....i do care bt ur well being....all i ever wanted is u...always....will things ever be rite again once n for all? i wonder....i guess both of us can never have a certain answer for that...its a jinx...really is...every time we make a pact constantly reminding ourselves not to get into a quarrel animore...but look what i have done here? will i ever make things right for u...? or the very least much easier for u....i dun knw...honestly i dont...fuck fuck fuck....

2006-03-15T13:28:00.000+08:00

okay okay okay..honey here i am trying to update the blog...its been a long time indeed since i bloggie woggie...hey honey dun be mad orite...a kiss frm me will help rite? hehehehehehehe...lifes been really good...having so much time together...loving every single moment i had wit him....honey i really love ya...i promise i wont get all cranky wanky animore k..its tiring i know...cant believe it its gonna be our 4 mnths soon in like anotha a week or so...great..absolutely love it...i love u lots honey....n remember this u cant run away frm me...i still wanna get married u knw..n im nt kidding bt the bouncer ,the cake , the soccer ball for the berkat??? yeah i mean all that..n u better stick ard coz like i always say u r the best person that can stand my shit...hahaahahha...hey but u still love me rite even at times i can be rather shit ass? hehehee...i love u lots u knw my big meow meow...n got to highlight this to the gerls out there...if u gerls have a thing for bad boys just like me...let me tell u this..bad boys cant eat proper for nuts...thats my conclusion after seeing tat travis show n having one for real beside me...hehehehehe...honey u look so hot n cool most of the times but when u start eating hmmmmm oh well.....*winkz*

i think i wanna touch on all the dreams tat i have been dreaming so far ...perhaps last nite dream in particular? dreams r just dreams like most ppl say..but then again dreams r the subconcious state of mind when we r sleeping isnt it...

i felt like i went into a deep sleep..
everything was in sequence..
everything was organised...
i was wit him...that ego bastard..
at that very same spot where
great n bad memories were shared..
it was raining heavily ...i was all alone...crying my hearts out...
as tho trying to tell the world something....but my voice just couldnt come out
so alone...so empty....or at least thats how i felt at that point of time...
the memories attached to that place angered me further and it makes me wanna hurl even more...
it just seems that im angry at the world...for reducing me to that state of mine in that dream...
n then the scenario changed ..i was still at that same spot but it wasnt raining at all...
but the confused look i had were very much still on my face...
that ego bastard was there too...playing the guitar for me...he was playing my fav song frm sum 41...
frm the way hes playing...it just seem he wanted something frm me...
forgiveness? answers? i dun know...
there was a long awkward silence the whole time we were there....
until he blurted out this...
` are u really happy the way u r now? is it really over between us? look at us...look at this place...its our place...theres so much memories here..r u sure u can just let it go in an overnite? remember i once ask u would u really be happy if one dae im nt in ur life animore? `
i think tats what the ego asked me in that dream....something on that line...
n i vividly remember i gave him a sneer look...with disgust...i was actually disgusted
by the words that are coming out frm his mouth....
coz i couldnt actually see for myself whether it was all for real or was it just one of his selfish act again...
the ego continued...` give me a last chance...n i will really prove to u that love doesnt have to hurt at all...`
and again that disgust look of mine coming frm me...
n i think my reply was this...
`u know something? u r nt that bad after all.....under that insensitivity of urs u do have a decent sense of compassion indeed`
i cried....cried my hearts out....
i cried not becoz i was sad...i cried becoz i felt stupid...y was i even there at that place wit him?
i told him ...`if u were to say all that last time...it mite have softened me inside..i mite be crawling back to u...but i had enuff of ur games...thanks for putting me thru all those times wit u...we went thru a lot indeed cant deny that...but look..look at my scars...do u know its haunting me so bad? do u know looking at all that reminds me of the bad past i ahd wit u...if u ever love me at all u would have spare a tot for my feelings...sitting here ..singing that song doesnt even help...it makes me hate u more...i want to start afresh without u....away frm u..y r u still haunting me now? n u know what...given that ego of urs..i know at the end of the dae u r just being selfish...n its true i will find that happiness ive been longing for when u r nt in my life animore....n if i continue sticking with u happiness seems so far away...rite at the end of the tunnel...`

i cried some more...tears keep rolling from my eyes...
n suddenly there was a bright light shining right thru my eyes....
i swear i saw something emerging frm the blue skies...
i was trying hard to open my eyes n see what it was...
n there came a figure...i still could nt fathom what it is...
it look like a man...with wings...riding a horse...
am i in a fairy tale of what? hahahahahaha...
my knight in shining armour or what?
darn...ok ok back to the story...
as hes coming closer...i felt a light breeze at my face...
i wanted to see badly who he was...
he got dwn frm his horse...he was very well built...
n he smash that ego guitar...hahahha....
he walked.....keep walking towards my direction....is he coming after me? is he going to hurt me?
then he stood there...rite in front of my face...he gave me an intense gaze right thru my eyes...
i felt very warm....very warm inside....as if he being there gave me a sense of comfort...a sense of belonging...
i tot to myself....he look familiar? have i seen him somewhere?
that man didnt even spoke a single word...he just stood there still looking at me...
n then he gave me a ring....with my name engraved in it....
he gve me a kiss on my hand...n he run his fingers dwn my face....n he ends it wit a kiss on my forehead...
n i cried again....i dun knw y but i did....
finally he open his mouth n told me this....
i have been watching u frm above ever since....to protect u frm any harm or any form of sadness...but as i watched just now...i can no longer just sit around n not do anything about it...i am here to give u two choices....life is all bout choices...its nt abt making the rite or the wrong choices..its all bout whether u r happy with the choice that u have decide on`...
with that he put out his hand....he had the same ring as mine..the one that he gave me....
he asked me a final question ` what are u afraid of?`
n i answered...` everything `
then he told me this...` i want u to put behind all ur fears...all the sadness...all the bad memories behind...im here for a reason...to take u away frm this place n gv u a fresh start...remember u got only two choices...one is to take a risk n leave me wit me where i can gv u everything that u have been asking for n two is to stay here n suffer just becoz u are afraid to get hurt once more....take ur pick...`
i cried again for the umpteen times....leave or stay? leave or stay? i dun knw how did i reason myself out but all i know
i step forward n take his hand...n got up that horse...n the scenario changed again...
i was at that place....that very same place where i sat wit him...our very first meeting...
i was leaning on his shoulders....he gave me a kiss on my forehead...
` hey honey u r up...u know wat u actually fell asleep on our first date..`
i look at him...there he was wearing the same identical ring i had on my fingers....
mine had NUR engraved n his had JUFRI engraved....
n then i was rudely woken up by that tamil version of twinkle twinkle alarm of mine.....
DARN!!!!!!!! hey i was having a date wit my honey bushuk for heaven sake...
yeah it was a long dream instead...i really felt like i was in a deep sleep....
i guess there was really logic on the words that he told me after all...
life is a bitch....
but baby i still want u ard to see the world the same way as i do...

honey like what u said in the dream...when u were that knight in tha horse...life is really indeed full of choices....the difference is that whether we r happy wih the choices that we made....i love u a lot darling....i really do....miss ya so much too...muackzz....
hey im nt making the dream up ok....u were in my dream last nite....muackz my dearie hubby wubby bushuk....

2006-02-24T13:06:00.000+08:00

Hie ho......Wow coming close to 3 mths...hmmmmm.....not bad...not bad.........

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Well yup like ts saes up thr....coming closer to my 3 mths anniversary...2 more daes n still counting down...hehehe.....well of coz...im quietly very happy about hw far ive cum in this relationship....hw far this relationship has gone....yup....quietly happy...hehehe.....

After so many tings dat haf happen within these months...da good.....da great.....da best....n da worse....all packed into 3 months of relationship....i dun tink its takin a shine off....still haf tings to accomplish...n untill all those tings in da list is done n ovea wit n all checked.....still gota pack lotsa stuff in da cumin months...

Hey bt 4 me....this cumin 3 month anniversary...brings a different feel to me actually...really been tinkin a lot about tis relationship...hw tings are....tings dat happen....memories....especially memories....reminiscing...well...cant help it...dats wat i do best....memories will foreva b part of me...

People oways sae.....its nvr gona be easy to find dat rite one for you...yeap i believe in tat once before....bt wat i oso believe is dat wen u find it...dun waste it....dun lose it...dun let u pass each otha...coz if its passed....u noe its never gona cum back...n if u haf found ur rite one...keep it....coz once u pass dat junction in ur life...n u take notice of dat person across da street....if u dun treasure it....lose it...Den u ask urself....whose da rite one??hw do u noe??4 me....its oways da same...from da start...da rite one...sumone hu is more den a lover....a fren....n sumone whom u urself can put above everytin in ur own life...wen u can find dat sumone...thrs nutin much u can do otha den treasure, n treasure n treasure.....

For me....within these months has only tot me one ting...all those lessons that i haf to learn....da hard way...yes....i do learn....wen i open my eyes....this relationship has tot me many more tings in my life...in my soul mind n body n da wae i tink...n ova da past few daes...ive realised only one ting....n tis words dat i told myself...has been stuck in my head eva since...."Every breath i take..n every morning sun...i will cherish it from nw on"....yes maybe wen life is so nice....so great....a simple bad....cud turns ting 360 degrees...i noe...its like a picture which is painted so nicely...bt a simple dark spot cud eventually smudge da whole painting...n for me now...i haf a beautiful picture in front of me now...n i wudnt want to take it for granted juz leave it unda da canvas n not look at it n enjoy it....coz i wud never noe if one dae sumone sumtin will juz smudge dat pict....n in all those times....i was juz ignorant of its presence.....

N i noe....wen i really open my eyes mind body n soul...to my whole surroundings....awareness....b more humble...i noe...i can achieve all da tings i wan in tis life...i noe i can....n i noe....all those tears dat i drown myself in.....i noe....its doing more good den harm...coz everytime i shed those tears...i noe...im juz a human being afterall....im not a man...neither a woman.....juz a pure human being.....n it allows me to rewind my life....take a step back.....n look at my life....a certain reflection....of tings....n da trials life brings to u....cud break u....or cud make u...u haf a sae....break urself...or basked urself in da sun.....i noe mine....

As of now for me....coming close to a 3 full months together now....n like ive told u....im gona cherish everyting dat ive build....everyting dat i haf....n to look at it everydae....wit a simple smile...n eventually i noe...i will be a complete better person.....n da love i haf....yes....im gona treasure it....n keep it...n do tis relaionship...wit a big smile on my face everydae of my life....

"Enjoy da morning fresh air...Is God's Greatest gift to mankind"

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Here's an advance munchkinz....

Happi Anniversary Baby.....Hey its 3 mnths n still counting...did u realise dat we'r 1/4 of a year done in our relationship....n da wae time has past....so quickly...heheh....we get to dat 1/2 wae point in no time....den remember baby.....hari raya?hehehe.....wud be so nice.....den we cum closer to a year....hehehehehe.....I love u alot baby....n oways will stay da same!hehehe....Muackzzzz....

Love,
Hubby Wubby Bushuk Bushuk Baby Cookie Monster

:)

2006-02-17T15:45:00.000+08:00

Ho ho ho......*dun worry its not christmas yet n im no santa claus*

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Yo yo peeps........Must b wonderin y im in such an upbeat mood huh??well actually im not....bt i am......hahaha...yeah im confused......

Well y da confusion?Firstly im so dead certain im gona screw ova ma computer networking module......blame it on luck??or blame it on maself???i dun fucking care....maybe its juz da lecturer...hahaha......yeah was so worked up tis morning about tat fuckin project....n really so stress......terrible....nutin seem to be rite tis daes wen it cumcs to computer networkin.....shitass topic.....n anotha reason im not too good....coz im apart from ma booboo....shes workin n doing ot too....darn doggies shits....n i gota wait till tmrw evening b4 i get to c her for dinner....welll cant wait for dat...hehehe...hey dinner is nice too u noe if ur wit somone u really love...n u treasure every moment u spend wit them...heheheh.....so nice!!!cant wait for ma dinner date wit ma boo!!!weee heee.....

Bt on da hindsight of all tis shitass events...i noe i can oways reminisce abt da past few superbly romantic/kinky daes......n da whole month or so for tis relationship....yeap....all dat will get me thru all tis...yes i noe it can...it will....it has too...

Yeap....da past few has been really sweet....been spendin so much quality time....its really hard for me to get myself out of those memories....coz theyr so nice....like on wed.....it was so hard for me to part waes wit ma boo wen da 11th hour came...coz even tho we only spend half da dae togetherr....we were cuddlin each otha so much tat we cudnt let go at all....hehehe....i literally had to drag maself outa da house...hehehe...its so nice to put ma boo to slp....*yeah she can get to slp wen i scratch her yummy soft butt...hehehehe...cute rite???*

Yeap dun worry boo...i will do all dat for ya all da wae from now till we get.....dum dum dum....dum dum dum dum.....i love u boo....

Nw i need to go release ma shit barrel.....yeah boo noes me well...

HEHEHEHEHE

I love u loads boo.....dun get all cranky orite....muackz!!!!!!!1

2006-02-12T12:53:00.000+08:00

Who watched Da grammy's????...................

I noe da grammys watched me instead.........*wink wink*

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Wow wow wow.......its been so long....very long huh.....yeah but guess hus back!!!!!its Mr Nur Syed Jufri....hehehe......hey cant help it.....life's been really good dat i practically use up every single sec of it till i haven had time for poor bloggie woggie....sorie sorie rite Mr Bloggie...(or is it Ms Bloggie....hmmmm......)

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Hehehe.....da past week....was really really good for me....n for us....we've really gone places....literally.....n in our relationship as well.....

We finally got our organiser done up....n its looking real cool rite now.....we'v wrote down all da stuff we need to achieve tis year n all da tings we need to buy tis year.....n we did a simple calculation on our budget....its reali nice....a sign of maturity????hmmmmm....tell me abt tat......well da future is all up for grasp......so y not grab it now rite....n have a beta future together....aiyah u idiots prolly wun undastand.....only me n ma booboo noes...hehehehe
N all those tok abt gettin a bike....n esp raya......gets me supa hyped up....i reali want tis yrs raya to make up for last yr's raya....wen like ma booboo kept on emphasising..."Yeah hu was da one hu disappeared last raya"....
Yeah booboo.....im really really am sorie.....n im hell bent on making it all up tis yr to u....n i wana give u da best raya eva eva va!in our white n pink baju raya!!!!!weeee........i love u lots tau booboo!!!!cant wait for raya.....
N of coz da bike....god can u pls get me a fucking job!!!!!i need money money!!!!

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Well da past 4 daes or so has been by far...excellent...tis week ma wifey is weking all am shift n she'll be seeing me rite up till next wed.....thank u god.....

Yeap spend wed wit her too like usual coz its her off dae....it was really nice coz we watched dat darn taiwanese ah beng show dat we both grow up watchin "Young N Dangerous".....hehehe.....yeah....we'r romantic n kinky n stuff......bt u wudnt want to mess wit us......coz we do haf a dangerous side....hehehehe.....watch out all u idiots!!!dun mess ard wit us u koo-koo-bird!
N dat nite.....i tink i realy made ma booboo laugh til she was so tired til she doze off wit a pen i her hands....hehehe....so cute la u booboo.....wit ur purple bacin bacin peta-ful pillow*ooopsss*.....mest cute!Yeah nw not only does she tinks im crazy....even her bestie tinks im crazy....she tinks i cant shut up....heheheh.....yeah as long as u peeps enjoy da clown in me......im gona continue being like tis!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!hahahaha...get ready to incur da wrath of Jufri da Clown!Muahahaha.....

Ah nw finally.......if u guys are wonderin wats wit ma headliner of tis blog abt da grammys??....hmmmm let me help ya.....well well....da grammys?wats da big deal.....hahaha.....not to me n ma booboo at least....coz its such a lousy show we ended up..................hmmmmmmm.........*wink wink*
Booboo.....I WANA NYAK NYAK AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN!plz plz plz......Tell me u dun miz Mr Massager??huh huh huh.....ur so yummy la boo.....i wana nyak u....its so nice...hehehehe.....
*Hmmm shall not go into to much details.....hey.....real men dun kiz n tell orite*
N honey....i still wana watch 40 yr old virgin*yeap we watched dat last thursday....bt gota skip lotsa parts coz....as we foound out...it wasnt really a family movie.....not with lotsa tits n pink nips!darn!*

N yest.....ma booboo took half dae leave juz to go to da east side!yeah!welcome to da east side boo!....hehehe.....we went to parkway yest.....walked ard da whole damn bloody shoppin centre n da whole marine parade neighbourhood....i guess ma boo really loves it thr dat she wana shift thr.....cute la u boo!....N arnt u glad dat ur hubby is a walking shoppin booklet???huh huh huh?hehehe
After our yummy dinner....in which i almost smashed a funky ching bitch face.....gsoh....dun pl haf a decent sense of courtesy....fucking bitch.....i really wanted to smash her face once n for all.....bitch.....
yEAH AFTER dat Nasi PattayA Nasi Pakprik meal.....we head on down to east coast beach...to enjoy a nice quiet moment together.....yeah its da only ting i feel i cud haf done after such a rough friday for ma booboo....yeah boo...sumtimes life juz a bitch....bloody suntec bitches.....bt i want to noe boo.....even if da world ard u collapse,n one dae u cum to suntec n its engulf in flames.....all i wana u to noe is dat im oways here....life in general may not haf any consistency...bt u noe i haf been...i unoe dat this relationship has dat....n i wana be wit u boo....up....or down.....i promise.....i hope watchin da sunset n sumtime at da beaCH chit chatin will help u ease ur mind a bit boo.....I LOVE U LOTS DARLING...N U NOE I CANT SEE U DOWN!

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WEell......after all tis recaps.....all i feel is oways da same...same ting i told ya....dat i honestly feel dat tis relationship has really blossom....yeap dear....i tink we are finally reaping da rewards after a mth or so of going thru all those shites.....i tink at tis moment......i really feel dat we'v grown boo.....in our relationship....n after thursday...yes dear...its not about personal pleasure....not at all....to me....its more emotional...coz like u sae...finally we haf no more barriers animore in our relationship...we cant open up every single aspects of tis relationship....n doing all dat....juz give a different kind of pleasure rather den physical.....n da closeness level dat we shared rite now boo.....its really sumtin i cant describe.....all i noe its dat i really feel very very warm inside....n wit all those tings to achieve tis yr.....tings are seriously lookin up.....i love u alot nur.....i really do....n i promise u....im here to stay......i love u.....i will marry u......i promise....

2006-02-10T11:44:00.000+08:00

back to werk as per normal...its been a long time since i bloggie woggie..had to today..just too many things on ma head..need to let it all out..i miss him a lot since i got a good two days wit him..i just wanna tell the world that im really happy at this point of my life...truly am happy..life has been good for me ever since i got into this relationship wit him..yeah for once life is really fair..for once i embrace life wit an open heart n not grudges...y the sudden change u ask? coz im not alone in this life animore...i got a purpose in life now....that very purpose i found always always always keeps me grounded..im very grateful for all that..im not complaining at all..i am really in love..at the end of the dae i am one happy lady....love was only love back then coz it didnt mean anything at all..to me it was senseless , meaningless and a waste of time..i even questioned the purity n genuinity of the word love itsef......even the existence of it...i even questioned myself whether i am capable of loving someone wit all my heart when my take on love was all blurry...but the bigger question in my life back then was whether i can find that someone who is worthy for me to keep n for me to give my heart away...i guess it really took me a long time to finally get an answer for that..or maybe that most overheard phrase is right after all..when u try so hard searching for love it just wont happen the way we want to but once we stop searching n once love itself come knocking in ur life it may change ur life forever...n the love of my life rite now totally blow me away..knock me dwn ..watever...all i know his existence in my life change the way i am now....n gerl yeah thnks for that comment...i am really happy..im glad u can see the change in me..its true for once in our years of frenship i dun gv out that look that im trying so hard to be happy n pretend that im nt dragging my feet in a relationship...i still want to emphasize those words that i told ya then...i know i made a rite choice n im nt goin to look back animore...point proven isnt it??
kinda have mix emotions when i start the dae todae...was all so hype up coz of wat happen last nite...then it kinda slide dwn coz got that msg n it became worse when they start talking to me bt that taboo topic at werk...gv me a break at least ..spare a tot for my feelings..shes my good fren here for heaven sake..do u think by touching on that topic i can still be nonchalant bt it n carry on wif my werk as tho nothing took place...yes its a great relief on u ppl coz u gonna have it easy when the black sheep is nt ard..as for me for stupid damn jesus christ sake im not gonna have it easy coz i lost a huge part of motivation for me to go to work...call me being emo..whatever..coz i really am..i treasure evry single frenship i have..including wif efah..as screwed as she is i still enjoy being ard her..at the very least shes nt plastic..shes nt afraid to show her true colours...n for that shes not fake like u ppl..n u guys have to be so hard on her..y cant u guys just go easy on her as always? bloody hell y?? y do ppl have to keep walking away frm me when i really need them ard..y cant things stays constant always? y do u have to take it all away ? i know its just a frenship but do u know how much that frenship means to me...at times the frenship i had wit her were way much better than the two gerls...at least i know shes always ard when i get to see her at werk...n now? whats the whole bloody point?? i hat u ppl for doin this..u guys dun fucking need to rub salt on my wounds..efah im really sorry for nt bein there when they all were against u..i know nothing i say ever gonna make u change ur mind bt staying..its ok if u dun stick ard here but as long as long as ur frenship stays the same i wont ask for more...no matter what those bitches think i know i never regret in making frens wit ya..y cant they just get that n go easy on our frenship? was it that hard? or r they just bein plain idiots?!!!! someone pls tell me...!!!!!
enuf of all that..not gonna make me feel better anyway...still gonna talk bt what happen yesterdae..that very incident which took me to cloud nine..darn...it was really good..yes doodoo it was all good..personally for me the pleasures that we get of doin that was nt the utmost importance....wat meant a lot to me was that im able to finally open up to u even in that sense...it was really hard for me to let go of the past..it did took me a while to get over that..the feeling of letting it all go n not holding back still leaves a lingering feeling inside...a real nice warm one nt in a kinky way tho darling..get that orite...as open as i am but when it comes to that thing i gotta be a lil conservative thinking this time round..i dun wanna go thru wat i did back then...it kinda make me feel like a cheap bitch on the aftermath period...hark!!!what the fuck...whats done cannot be undone...no point dwelling too much on it...as long as i dun let history repeat itself i can overwrite all that...eeeeeeeeee.....so disgusting sia just having the thots of me getting all intimate wit someone else rather than my own doodoo...super big turn off...dun find men outside yummy animore...got my own yummy kinky notti lil dearie baby cookie monster..shld gv him a new nick now...`mr massager`..*winks* heheheehhe....yeah doodoo u make me all sick u know that...so nice to nyak nyak u...the thing is its just nice nyaking someone whom u really love ...n this time round nyak nyak is nt just nyak nyak...by our terms nyak nyak means a bond which brings us even closer or dare i say escalates our relationship up another level whether in emotion or physical aspect..n that is something which nt many ppl can undastand..i mean we r nt even like most ppl aniwae in the first place...so that explains the way we do things n the way we visualise things......doodoo i really love u a lot but at times i just want u....yes i want u...heheheh...shall do that some time soon k darling doodoo...u so cute lah...geram i ...love ya lots darling munchkinz....muackzzzz....

2006-02-02T23:41:00.000+08:00

Always said I would know where to find love,
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,
But some times I just felt I could give up.
But you came and changed my whole world now,
I'm somewhere I've never been before.
Now I see, what love means.

It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now,
Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now,
I was lost and you've rescued me some how-.
I'm alive, I'm in love you complete me,
And I've never been here before.
Now I see, what love means.

When I think of what I have, and this chance I nearly lost,
I cant help but break down, and cry.
Ohh yeah, break down and cry.

*my dearie doodoo i really love ya lots...n yes i wanna walk down the aisle wit ya..only ya honey..love ya lots*

2006-01-28T18:25:00.000+08:00

darn...fine i know im not one of those fucking chingz here celebrating the fucking stupid festival...im here werking while he is at hm alone....u know how fuck up is that? i could have jolly well be spending quality time together rather than being stuck here in the mall when there r practically not much people here..what is the whole fucking point then? someone really pls tell me??!!!!! yes im cranky ..i am..cant deny that n wont deny that either..coz the whole point is i wanna see my doodoo badly..i really miss him badly....n i always alwas have to werk aftn shift each time there is a public holidae goin on...i swear i hate u guys for that...im still not done yet wif u ppl for makig me werk pm shift for every single damn weekends for the whole entire mnth..yes yes...im still sore..i really wish i could kill u all now..at least it could subside my anger a lil bit..yes just a lil bit...doodoo come save me..im cranky all ova..doodoo i miss u lots u know that..really wish i can be by ur side rite now..haiz...come mon we have to make it all up k doodoo..pls pls pls..i really need all that..im so deprived of getting ur love and attention..i really miss him lots..yeah cant think of anything else..i miss him..i miss him..i miss him..i miss him..

done talking...no one can help me here...really no one here can....doodoo miss ya lots..let me gv ya a big fat kizz ok...muackzzzzzz!!!!!!

2006-01-26T19:27:00.011+08:00

Happi Anniversary!!!!woo hoo!!!! 2 months..........n many more to come!!!!!woo hoo!!!!!*Darn....bt im alone now....*

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Hey hey.....its been a while huh since we've done sum bloggie woggie.......gosh sorie....now da updates.....weee....

Well as u may noe now.....today...is da 26th of Jan 2006......yeah its our 2nd month anniversary....gosh hw to flies....trust me wen i sae flies.....it files faster den a jet plane......darn....tats wen life's unfair....bluerkZ~

Eventho today is our anniversary.....we cant get to celebrate it with each otha....coz she gota work....bt hey...we did make it all up last nite.....had a nice super nyummy dinner last nite to celebrate our anniversary.....hehehe.....*check out da picts aite*....den we juz spend a very quite nite....juz walkin around quiet bt beautiful places.....n get sum peace wit ourselves....yeap...a mellow tone down anniversary.....a stark contrast to wat we experience last month....eee......crap....hehehe....tis month...it was such a hastle free celebrationn.....absolutley love it.....coz we really switched everytin else from our lives n juz spend dat nite out.....quietly....i love dat....n i tink she loves dat.....heheheh....*u love tat rite booboo???hehehe*

Well wat matters to me actually is not whether we spend da quietest of an evening....or da raunchiest of da nite....bt to me...wat really matters was dat quality n those emotions dat we shared every single time we go out....even if it was to haf a nice bowl of noodles*ban mian* at Lot 1.....we still enjoy tat....now....dats wen u say....u enjoy da simple pleasures life can bring....n wen u can do all dat....life itself becomes beautiful.....n to tink of it....its not even dat hard to achieve all dat....bt its juz human nature.....to take all tis simple tings for granted....bt not us...not her....n definitely not me....coz to me...every moment...every breath counts.....n gota make full use of it....

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Cant believe its been 2 mths from where i started from dat morn....dat morn wen i woke up....n told myself....im no longer gona wait....im no longer gona shy away....its time to face up to reality....n make good of da virtual world by turning it all to reality....n i did dat....dat dae.....dat nite....26th November 2005....forever will be etched in ma memories....n forever be in ma heart.....coz dat was da dae....a brite light shone into my world again....
After 2 mths of shared feelings....2 mths filled wit emotions....all i haf to sae is.....its all worth it.....n time n time again....i haf to convince myself tat im no longer dreaming coz everytin....tis relationship itself.....her......is so nice...so rite...dat at times...it does feel like a dream.....da most perfect of dreams.....n if it was....den i dun ever wana wake up from it.....coz in dis dream....all dat i ever needed...all da answers dat life itslef cant bring to me...is all here.....so pls dun take tis away from me....

N tis relationship itself....has tot me many tings....always to be optimistic....n of coz....n dat one most over used phrase....."all is not lost"..hehe....hw true....n hw life has changed....at one point....everything in tis world seems to crumble rite in front of u...ur life was a landslide of epic proportion.....den suddenly....suddenly....wen ur ready to let everyting in ur life go....wen ur ready to jump of dat cliff.....wen life itself has no more meaning.....sumone juz walks in n give u a nice ice cold shower to wake up from ur own nitemares....n in one turn.....ur life itself went into a 360 revolution....yes...dats da power of dis relationship....life change...ive change....for once u gave me a purpose....n now...my purpose in life is juz one ting....one ting....to give happiness to u.....

N all those promises ive made....all those "i promise"....all those interlocking last finger....yes they'r not juz words....they'r not juz actions....tis are da tings dat i will do.....yes i will do all dis..... all for you......

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* I love you booboo.....doodoo really loves u alot u noe booboo.....muackzzzzzz!!!!Love u forever n ever never booboo*

2006-01-21T14:01:00.000+08:00

Finally im able to drag maself outa bed now.....wow....wat a lazy start to tis lazy saturday...hehehe....wat else is new...wen da wifey is away....da hubby juz sleeps in bed....sob sob...heheheheheehehe....

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Well wat a week it was for us...so nice...after daes of not meeting her...*2 n a half daes to be exact*...we did manage to spend really really really quality time during her two off daes...it was really great i haf to sae...bt as usual....ma usual complain....Y DOES TIME FLIES SO FAST WEN WE'R SPENDING TIME TOGETHER!!!...hehehe.....

I got ma peircing done on ma rite side..hhehehenow got a nice pair of blings blings....juz like ma baby!weee....n ma baby...shes looking much much more sexier wit dat tragus piercing...heheh....*yeap i noe i didnt tell u dat baby..hehehe....*coz dat piercing make her look a lot more fierce..hehehe....oooohh scary!!!hehehe...*hmmm more like oooh yummy*hehehe....cant wait to do ma eyebrow piercing...n cant wait for ma baby to pierce her navel...gosh she look even more sexier...so nyum nyum ma baby...hehehe....*bt heck she gota get done n ova wit her chicken barrier of piercings...oooopsss!!*
N den of coz....dat nite....one nite i will forever keep in ma heart....n i hope to haf more of dat....its so nice to haf da whole family in for dinner...yup her dad....her mom....sis n bro...n of coz...me senor...heheheheh...its so nice to juz haf dinner....n an added bonus...da food was really nyum nyum....really like da whole family tingy...really treasure those moments...its so nice baby...it really is....
Den last nite...hehehe....spent time at her home...n of coz.....lotsa quality time too...before we head off to Queensway....it was nice since ma baby was still looking to xpand on her already overgrown collection of slipers....*oh well.....women...wat else is new...heheheh....oopss....dun kill me honey....ur slippers are nice!*i love all dat...its so nice.....

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Of late....we really been xposed to songs dat really really suit us....n wen i sae suit...gosh....really get us so emo...

Nickelback- Far away....
Lifehouse- Everyting....

N now....Mary J Blige....Be without you....gosh da queen of soul....oways oways reel me in wit her song....

Been talkin alot about our so called "frenship" stages after listening to dat nickelback song...hehehe...well we both cum to agree dat well it wasnt frenship after all...to me...heheh....i really wasnt...yes unknowingly or knowingly we were really supressing our feelings for each otha....living in self denial...no matter how painful it was...we were really living life like dat....for me...waking up each morning after each msn session...wondering if she tinks of me...wonderin if im on ma own on da wae i tink about us...tinkin of waes to not to tink so much about having a relationship wit her.....trying so hard to live in self denial...pretending....even if it hurts....juz to not risk any chance of losing her...yeah...unknowingly i was treasuring her so much dat i juz didnt wat to turn her away from me one way or anotha....n now....wen we'r finally here at tis stage of our lives....wen we sit back n tink about all thats been done....all da tings dat we've been doin to each otha....yes i finally can admit to u...to myself....i haf loved u all along.....n i never haf let u go den...n da future...coz tis relationship is not like da rest...its different....its for real.....its filled wit truth...n emotions....i love u...i always will.....n i always haf been....

Den da Mary song...really got me down...yeah....all emo...really kept readin n readin n readin thru da lyrics dat nite....it was juz so surreal.....da lyrics....really got me there...n all i can do after all those lyrics......was juz to lie in bed....n really dwell myself in serious thots of her...hw much i love her...hw much she means to me.....so much thots....n honestly juz tinkin about being without her can bring such a tumultous spin in ma head....yes....i am really really afraid to lose her...coz i noe....wen i came into tis relationship....from da start....i noe....ma feelings for her.....was juz all over da place....da love...yes i fell really really hard....into her.....n even a slight tot of wateva negativity....really burns me an awful lot...bt after last nite.....i can wipe all those negativity out ma life....n wit u....i noe...baby......i haf dat one special person.....da rite one dat ive been talking about all along...yes u r da one baby....n da love i haf for you baby....its really really a whole bunch of it...n i juz really really hope u can see dat....coz i wan to be dat man hu give u all da happiness u deserve baby in tis world...yes i promise u happiness...n i promise dat wit ma life.....as long as im breathing....as long as ma soul is here.....im wit u....i will bring dat happiness...da joy....da love ....i love u baby....n im not going aniwhere...i really love u alot baby....n baby....im for real....i promise....

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I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)
I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)Oooo (oh, oh, oh, oh) oooo

Chemistry was crazy from the get-go
Neither one of us knew why
We didn't build nothing overnight
Cuz a love like this takes some time
People swore it off as a phase
Said we can't see that
Now from top to bottom
They see that we did that (yes)
It's so true that (yes)
We've been through it (yes)
We got real sh** (yes)
See baby we been...

Too strong for too long (and I can't be without you baby)
And I'll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can't sleep without you baby)
Anybody who's ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can't be without your baby

I got a question for ya
See I already know the answer
But still I wanna ask you
Would you lie? (no)
Make me cry? (no)
Do somethin' behind my back and then try to cover it up?
Well, neither would I, baby
My love is only your love (yes)
I'll be faithful (yes)I'm for real (yes)
And with us you'll always know the deal
We've been...

Too strong for too long (and I can't be without you baby)
And I'll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can't sleep without you baby)
Anybody who's ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can't be without your baby
See this is real talkI'm always stay (no matter what)
Good or bad (thick and thin)Right or wrong (all day everyday)

Now if you're down on love or don't believe
This ain't for you (no, this ain't for you)
And if you got it deep in your heart
And deep down you know that it's true (come on, come on, come on)
Well, let me see you put your hands up (hands up)
Fellas tell your lady she's the one (fellas tell your lady she's the one, oh)
Put your hands up (hands up)
Ladies let him know he's got your love
Look him right in his eyes and tell him
We've been...

Too strong for too long (and I can't be without you baby)
And I'll be waiting up until you get home (cuz I can't sleep without you baby)
Anybody who's ever loved, ya know just what I feel
Too hard to fake it, nothing can replace it
Call the radio if you just can't be without your baby

Heeeeeeeeeeeey Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
Heeeeeeeeeeeey Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh

I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you
I wanna be with you, gotta be with you, need to be with you

*Baby....i dun ever wana be without u baby...i love u lots...so keep breathing...n never let me go...*

2006-01-21T00:30:00.000+08:00

im here ...finally...been so long since i blog..been so long since i let out all my feelings...had a wonderful quality time wit him..a real nice one..no quarrels...no cranky mood...its just lots of love...tender loving ones at that...yeap been listening to that song since i switch on ma comp..really sitting on ma head....the lyrics alone ...the lyrics...yeap its the lyrics...

~Chemistry was crazy from the get-go
Neither one of us knew why
We didn't build nothing overnight
Cuz a love like this takes some time
People swore it off as a phase
Said we can't see that
Now from top to bottom
They see that we did that (yes)It's so true that (yes)
We've been through it (yes)
We got real sh** (yes) See baby we been... ~

yeap ..love that particular verse damn lot..i dun knw y..maybe its the song..maybe its the tune..maybe its just me...or maybe it just reminds me of my relationship itself..yeap nothing was built in a single damn nite..it wasnt even easy for us to get here...had to go thru lots of shits...oh well when i say its shit trust me its really shit...just listening to the song alone made me realise one thing..that i really love him a lot wif all my heart...never felt like this before...i swear...not even back then...that wasnt even love i suppose...this time round its so different..i know it for myself..i can see it for myself...i know i can trust on my feelings this time..i know i`ve made the rite decision..i know that i`ve found the answers to whatever questions i always asked in life...to me he is the answer to everything...yes he is indeed...im just glad that i have him in my life...n yeah honey i have always loved u all along..even before that confessions..the feelings for ya wasnt even based on frenship anymore...it wasnt...yeas it wasnt... were in self denial all along..n honey its killing inside...to hide all emotions inside..to pretend that the feelings were nt there..i cant do all that for too long..i just cant...i know i cant live without u being ard..the dae u went away...it hurts...hurts so badly..but at least it did made me realise one thing..that i couldnt brush aside all the feelings..i couldnt carry on wif the pretence...i have to make known my feelings somehow...n glad is the word...yes im all glad when i could actually take the guts to tell ya whatever pent up emotions i hide inside...it felt great..n where we r now at this point of time...it couldnt have been much better...i honestly really love u a lot honey...i cant express it into words but i really do hope u can feel all that..its just nice waking up every dae knowing that u have that one special person in ur life..it feels so different ...it feels wonderful...awfully wonderful...haiz...honey honey i really love u a lot...at times i just wish i have u by my side all the time...hehehe...yeap i`ve gone bonkerz...bonkerz over u...honey honey...n the promise i made to ya?? trust me i gonna keep it well ...i really will...gonna keep my word...yeap im gonna do just that...

ok done blogging..back to that song agn...darn..nickelback..mary j blige...lifehouse...arrghhh...y must u do all this to us???

2006-01-17T19:47:00.000+08:00

Well im back at home now...hehehe......back from dinner.....nyum nyum....
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Yeap i juz got back home from dinner....yesh wit ma darling wifey....hehe....i love to call ma baby dat...so nice...hehehe....yeap went to meet her for dinner juz now....had Corona?Or is it Cavana?okay i dunoe...all i noe its chicken rice...hehehe.....yup.....chicken rice.....

Well wats important is not da chicken...or da rice...its da person ur having da meal wit...yep...i love having meals wit ma baby...yeah its so nice...especially after going 3 daes of not spending proper time wit her...*yeah gota make do wit tis bits n pieces of time dat i haf*...well it juz kinda gets me going for da next few hrs after not seeing her....*yeap gona see her tmrw...weee*...ive been missing her so so badly...haiz at times...i dunoe wat wud happen if shes not here in ma life...she really haf turned me inside out....

Last nite...was so...emotional for me...hahah....yeah i dunoe y....after she sent me dat song...*everything-Lifehouse* da whole lyrics of da song really really sat in ma head so much really makes me tink so much about her...i never tot life wud be like tis for me....ive really finally found da meaning of love...n being loved...da feeling is juz really so overwhelming for me...wen i listen to da song....wow....juz makes me more overwhelmed wit feelings...i never tot dat someone cud haf made such an impact in my life...yes she has....n i never tot i cud be so in love wit someone...untill she walked into ma life...its juz kinda liberates me n i juz haf to shower her wit so much love every single moment of her life...To me...shes really da most beautiful woman i ever met in ma life..beautiful outside...bt wat matters more...is her inner beauty...its so overwhelming...da wae she loves....da wae she makes me feel....its juz so so.....i dunoe wat to sae....she really has changed me as a whole...as a person....n as a human being....yes u haf baby....to me....shes like such a treasure...dat uve try to search ur whole life for....da pot of gold at da end of da rainbow...yes....being wit u baby.....is juz....so nice baby....u really special to me darling.....n all i wana do now is juz give u all da love i haf in me...n all da love dat i can find in this world....yes...i will do juz all dat...stick wit u till ma last breath.....yes...i will be here....holding ur hands....lovin ur heart....till da dae.. i leave tis world....i will baby.....i will....i promise....

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*Dat song dat me cry last nite....*

find me here
speak to me
i want to feel you
i need to hear you
you are the light
that is leading me
to the place where
i find peace again
you are the strength
that keeps me walking
you are the hope
that keeps me trusting
you are the life to my soul
you are my purpose
you are everything
and how can i
stand here with you
and not be moved by you
would you tell me
how could it be
any better than this
you calm the storms
you give me rest
you hold me in your hands
you won't let me fall
you still my heart
and you take my breath away
would you take me in
would you take me deeper now'cause you're all i want
you are all i need
you are everything
everything

Lifehouse-Everything

2006-01-15T19:40:00.000+08:00

feel like blogging at this point of time....its cold dwn here...n im all alone nw...so bored...blogging is the only source of killing the fucking boredom at werk...hahaha...i think im getting cranky soon...no no ...dun worry its nt cranky in a bad way...its just that i miss my hubby a lot...i miss him..i miss him..cant survive properly without seeing him...n yah i smell of him now...heheheh..i used his playboy musk...honey honey i knw thats crazy but i cant help it...i wanna smell like u..u smell so nice so i wanna smell same same...n yeah he look so damn cute last nite when hes eating pasta..cream sauce all over his lips..i swear if my crazy buddy were nt ard i gladlylick all the sauce frm his lips...honey u look so cute when u eat like that u knw...so comot...hehhe...i love u lots lah darling...last nite talk wit him bout the hari raya preparation was so nice..ok fine i know raya is nt like ard the corner but hey time do pass that fast ok...nuting wrong to plan early...honey u knw rite im not a big fan of that stupid festive thingy but i hav to admit that i cant wait for that this year...hehhe...coz its gonna be so different spending it wit someone u love ..it just gives a whole new meaning to it..i guess rite now i can finally understand the real joy of embracing that moment together wit the one u love...n the real joy in my life rite now is having him in my life...i couldnt be more blessed than that...hes everything i ever asked for..hes everything i ever needed..hes everything i ever wanted...bottomline hes everything to me..period....talking bt him makes me miss him even more...haiz...y does it have to be this way...haiz...haiz...honey honey i miss u lots u knw...cant even think straight of what to blog...in ma head is onli HIM HIM HIM HIM HIM...N MORE OF HIM..arrrrrrrggggghhhhhhh....im gone..so gone...somebody pls save me...

done blogging peeps..actually wanna blog more but yeah cant think straight...what the hell...

2006-01-15T14:02:00.000+08:00

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,you know, you know

[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up'
Cause you know,you know, you know

[CHORUS]
So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving
Hold on to me and, never let me go

*Honey honey...i tink really reflects on dat point of our lives wen we sort of disappeared from each otha...yeah...tis song will explain to u....wat i was feeling at dat point of time*especially those parts in italic*
....I love you baby.....im stickin wit u like glue...foreva!!Muackzzzzzzzz!!!!*

2006-01-14T01:59:00.000+08:00

Okay.....filled wit lotsa tots.....so much tings in ma head now...hehehe....well juf.....wat else is new from u rite...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hurt....such a word huh....yeah....a big word indeed in ma dictionary....been hurt before u asked?huh....well outa question.....dun haf to ask.....hu didnt?its juz hw bad it can be....so bad dat it will dent u for da rest of ur life?so bad dat it will stick wit u thru ur life?or will it eventually fade.....da question ive never been able to answer...

Watched n heard from too many people around me gettin hurt.....feeling da hurt...reeling from it....people spend years removing sumtin from the....which isnt even tangible....memories u sae?yeah....bitter memories.....memories of shame.....memories of guilt.....so many memories....kept in da mind...bt actually closer to da heart...

Da past 3 years or so for me...well...more down den ups.....yeap...everytime i go up a step....i fell 2 steps back....y u asked?too much pressure?too overworked?too stress?too soft??hah.....honestly i dunnoe da answer at all to tat question....ma life was always in ma hands....n if tings dun go da wae it it...i only haf myself to blame...yes....only urself...its true....u hold da key to ur life...bt atimes... u need to share....share da same common path in life....walk a journey side by side....n yes....wen ur on dat journey....u meet people...people hu will fill ur life wit memories.....da good...n da bad....da sweet...n da bitter....yes they will.....n yeah for me.....more bitterness den sweet......yes it was.......

Bt on da surface....tis face will hide a thousands tears...tis face will keep a thousand words....both of joy...n of sadness....n for me...living life on my own....was really tough.....moving around aimlessly in da nite...searching for a soul tats willing for me........Coz lifes gettin too fake....every moving body was a fake.....every moving soul heart n mind was ingenuine....yes....wen ur down.....da lights go out on u....n den u juz gota drag ur helpless soul outa of da pitch black darkness....or reach out....for a genuine helping hand.....sharing a truth sumwhere....trying to find one....

Trying to look for a soul who can bring sum authenticity in tis life....a new purpose to it....a new meaning to it.....search da world u haf too......someone told me dat....bt keep it close wit u wen u haf it.....coz theres juz no more genuine people around....n it will be juz a needle in a hay stack if u find it....yes.....hard....bt if u wana life to be da wae life shud be...

now im at a junction of ma life....looking left n looking rite.....with a soul....yes im holding on to a hand....dat will pull me out of pitch darkness....a hand for da truth of tis life??a hand to lead me out into tis world filled wit venom?or a hand da will shield me from it?

U tell me....

2006-01-14T01:43:00.000+08:00

y the hell must i stumble on all that? shit its now really sitting on ma head..cant think straight...i really cant....i just need to let it off ma chest...im hurting...hurting so badly rite now just thinking of it now...y cant i just let go of all that? i`ve cried enuff back then so y do i still shed a tear just thinking of all that? was it really bad? did i really let go of the hurt? how can i let go of all that when the wound is still fresh...my dear fren time heals all wounds...i know all that...heard that a lot...told that a lot to myself as well...but its still there...the wound is still there...have u actually went thru what i did? did u really hear my story enuff? can u honestly tell urself that u can understand me n put urself in my shoes? no u cant...coz u r not me...im still very much haunted by my shadows...its really that bad...my dear fren i guess u mite think im just being hard on myself...but y dun u sit dwn n think? did i have it easy when i was wit him? did he at least tried to make it easy for me? its not only taxing emotionally...but physically?!! did u knw that? i guess not coz no one knows...u knw how much that hurts each time it happens..then y do u think i keep telling u i always knock myself against something when there are bruises?? were u that stupid...were u that blinded...were u just ignorant...were u just being taken in by his words? what kind of satisfaction u deprived frm all that? can someone pls tell me...tell me how can i ever leave that shadow frm myself each time i look at myself? each time i get reminded just by looking at those scars? how can i possibly do all that? y does it have to be that way? y must god be so harsh on me? i have only myself to blame...the only way i can help myself was to get myself out frm that shit...i just cant...i dun know y but i just cant...coz i was still hoping it mite change one dae...was too naive...was too blinded...was too ignorant...so pushed to a corner where i cant even run...things wasnt really goin on my way...trying so much to get attention to make ppl notice that im here...to a point where i even toyed wif the idea of maybe if i start being suicidal ppl mite really sit up n took notice...yeah its dwnrite stupid of me to even be thinking of that but yeah i really did think of all that...no sense of belonging at all...no sense of worth...nothing at all...just me being there without my soul...happiness back then was crap... what was happiness aniway then? being the butt of joke in the relationship? it hurts...really hurts...till now...the scars hurts...when i think too much on that...it hurts...god were u being fair to me? letting me come across that kind of person? making me go thru it all alone? till now i still dun have an answer to all that...what is fair anyway in this life? had enuff of all that...really had enuff....god pls let me off...cant tolerate all that anymore...what the fuck...done blogging...someone pls tell me .....im in need of an answer...

2006-01-13T23:55:00.000+08:00

something which i stumble upon ...
something which really leaves a lasting impression...
something which makes me ponder real hard...
trying so hard not to let it sits in on ma head..
at times i have to admit ignorance is bliss...
knowing too much of truth hurts....badly....

here is something frm what i stumble upon on

" The pain had been inflicted once, and the incident could have even been long forgotten by the perpetrator, but it was ME who held onto it. Haunting and hurting myself, over and over.

Of course, it is very very difficult to let go. Sometimes, we need our feelings validated to help us move forward. Sometimes, even an apology doesn't help, because the pain was so much.

Take a step back, and really think. Was it really that bad?

Sure, when the hurt happened, the feelings were real. Rightly or wrongly, logically or illogically, reasonably or unreasonably - we feel the hurt, and the sting of the pain was very real.

But I took a close look at myself.

After suffering the same unhappiness for some time, I have come to realise that the only thing that is haunting me, is ME.

I did not let go of the hurt."

*did i really let go of the hurt? or did i not ? keeps me wondering....*

2006-01-13T14:33:00.000+08:00

Time: 2:37
Venue : 1442
Weather : Juz nice to snuggle...

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Yeah i juz got screwed by da lab asst for smashing da printer....cant help it la...it didnt do its job......

Haha.....

Well i met ma baby last nite.....yeah we sort of talk about our past......frenship stages of tis whole journey....kinda nice to recap those daes ah....or nite i wud sae......spending hours staring at da comp...waitin for words from both sides....a person sumwhere in tis country uve never met or SPOKEN a single word too...bt yet.....still so hooked....

Yeap those nites was so wonderful....such a wonderful wonderful frenship we shared...so inseparable at times...even wen it was time to sleep...hehehe.......yeap....it was a frenship made virtually....n a place we both cud call home.....a place whr we seeked a peace of mind....n to forget all our problems.....stop our lives....n jus be da person we oways wanted to be....happiness....was all dat we seek.....n happiness was all we cud get out frm tat few hrs.....bt deep down....unknowingly.....it was in each othas hearts......was dat place......dat place we call home....was actually each othas.....

N wen we lost all dat for a moment....yeap.......ma life....like urs...fell apart....remember da first ever time we quarrel dear?da very first time wen u got so pissed wit me?yeah can never forget that....i oways tot tat was it for us....bt our frenship prove to be alot stronger den i tot.....yeah....since den.....i knew.......tis frenship.....will last......till da end of time......no matter wat is thrown at us.....yeap we'll get thru it all....n slowlyy too.....i noe.....feelings was creeping in on me.....yeap....i felt it....bt i had to push it aside.....there was nutin more dat i want den tis frenship.....n i wasnt willing to risk it....yeap....i wasnt....

Try as i mite......pushed as i can.....deny all i want.....bt deep down...i noe...i was feeling you.....yes i was falling into sumting deeper den juz frenship......n tings juz got amplified wen ma virtual world crashed.....n no more communication wit you......juz made me feel like Tom Hanks in da movie Castaway.......yeah felt like tat.....all alone......all cranky......all.....n of coz....i wasnt myself.....coz i was losing a very large chunk of ma life....yes i gota admit it....i was attached to da whole ting....it has become an everydae ting....den i oso noe......one ting....i missed u.....yes i missed tat person........n wen i got myself everytin again....da first person dat i wanted back in ma life was u.....i has to be u n no one else.....coz ma happiness.....ma joy.......is wit you.....i cum to realise dat.....n it was never da same wen we'r apart.......its juz doesnt seem rite....

N eventually.....on dat nite.....wen we spilled da beans.....ova wat was in our hearts......yes....we were takin it up....higher....movin forward wit wat we built on.....n i dun regret dat one single bit now darlin....coz look at where we are now baby???juz taKE a look at us now??we've cum a long wae.....yes winding road indeed.....wit so many tings ard us.....yet here we are.....standing side by side with nutin bt juz love for each otha....yes....its all worth it.....

Honey....lets stick together rite baby....like glue......im so in love wit you darlin.......so very in love wit you......N all i can sae now is dat tis journey wit u....haf been all worth it......n now....like where we were dat nite wen we did our confessions....yeah...lets take anotha step forward.........towards next year....

Muackzzzzzz.....I love you darlin snoogum!!!n i cant wait to see u in a short wile!weeeeee!

2006-01-13T10:51:00.000+08:00

Boy you fill me with so much joy you give whatever it is
I need,my love here to stay won't ever leave
So glad that you fell in love with me My love is so good that
I wouldn't be without you babe couldn't see me without you babe, my love is so good that I wouldn't be without you babe couldn't see me without you baby, all my life
I've been searching for you everyday, so gladthat I found you boy, all my life I've been feeling for you everyday I'm so happy baby, boy you got me feeling so good
you take all my pain away from me without you around
I couldn't be and I know you fell in love with me.
My love is so good that I wouldn't want to be without you babe
couldn't see me without you babe
My love is so good that I wouln't be without you baby couldn't see me
Without you baby. All my life I've been searching for you everyday,
so glad that I found you boy,all my life I've been feeling for you
everyday I'm so happy baby I'm so happy that I fell in love
I thank God, He sent you from up above,
I'm so happy that I found someone
and I thank God he sent you from above.
All my life I've been searching for ya, everyday, so glad thatI found you boy,
all my life I've been feeling for you everyday I'm so happy baby.
All my life I've been searching for ya,everyday so glad that I found you boy,
all my live I've been feeling for you everyday I'm so happy baby.
Hmmm that I wouldn't be without you babe couldn't see me without you babe and I wouldn't be witout you babe couldn't see me without you baby

*dearie honey...this song for ya...im so glad i have u wit me rite here...i love ya lots...muackzzzzz!!!!! n yeah im deprived of TLC at this very moment...*

2006-01-12T23:35:00.000+08:00

now im back at hm...without him ard....darn...y does the nite has to end there..gonna see him agn tmr but still nt enuff...i want to see him 24/7 always...ard the clock...nah not possible...hehehe....todae topic for ma blog ..hmm....lets see...well i think i gonna talk bt the past..that frenship stage of ours...yeah `frenship`...got that?? coz we were actually talking bt the past just now when we were walking hm...so i guess its kinda nice to recap all those sweet memories before we actually come to this stage..yeah those times back then were all sweet..cant deny that....never felt like that before..i mean cmon a virtual fren? honestly would ppl actually invest their time on all that? n im not even talking bt time alone...emotions as well..i mean honestly on my part ..i have to admit that as our frenship grows feelings starts to creep in..im very comfortable wit the frenship ..a fresh n genuine one..something which is hard to come by..honey u r a rare find..i must say...n finding u among the rest was not an easy feat...i honestly dun believe in making frens virtually coz yeah i have this belief in me that they r a one n off kind of ppl...but after knowing u thru all those nites i have to admit that i did really have high hopes on our frenship..coz at the end of the dae or shall i rather sae nite...i just have to find u first before i can call the dae quits...our frenship was really indeed a big source of motivation for me to move on wit life..coz honey seriously at that point of time i really couldnt see whats the real meaning of life..i mean everything wasnt goin on well for me..esp in relationship..my past relationship alone is very taxing..really taxing..n i was a very much confused person wit no clear cut directions in what i gonna do...but as soon as i know..u gave me a sense of hope..a sense of comfort...a sense of belonging..a sense of warmth..n honey when u went missing in action honestly i hate all that..my hair still stands when i do think bt that...when i reflect back on how i felt when u were gone...i really couldnt go to sleep at nite coz deep down im still waiting for that someone..wondering whether he still thinks of me..wondering whether he still needs the frenship..wondering whether what we shared do mean something to him..yeah went thru lots of sleepless nites...just couldnt bring myself to off the comp ..afraid that he mite come in to look for me..i wasnt ready at all to lose all that..i really need all that..coz that frenship wasnt just a frenship anymore...yeah i really care for u at that point of time..i really need u at that point of time...in a virtual way i mean...i really need all that to get me thru....u know the feeling of losing something which is so dear to ur heart? u know hw much that hurts? how broken i felt? how lost i felt? ..i really tot i have to learn to accept the fact that good things need to come to an end one dae..but the real fact was im not even ready to give it up..i mean i could still wait forever for ur appearance...coz yeah i really need u to be ard..it was that bad...i hate that..i hate that...my hair really stands when i do think bt that...emotions keeps flooding back..its not that im getting emo over something which is done n over wif..no its not that..it just serves as a reminder that we really do need to treasure something which is hard to come by..n for me that something is him..yes its u honey..u r that treasure in my life..i gonna cherish it so well coz i dun even want to thru any more of sleepless nites feeling so lost...now i have u rite here with me i gonna appreciate u even more...i dun regret giving up everything for ya coz u r worth all that...i really love ya lots honey..i really wanna go thru every single years of my life wit ya...even if i were to die one dae i have to die knowing that i have loved u enuff....u mean an awfully lot to me darling...n trust me im not gonna screw things up in this relationship coz its just senseless...

P/S: really cant wait for 2007...hehehe...just cant wait to kol myself NUR SYED JUFRI...hehehe...love ya ....muackzzz

2006-01-12T09:01:00.000+08:00

Time: 9:04am
Place : T1553
Weather : Very Cold!

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Wassup wit da weather nowadays....darn...its so damn bloody cold.....im already with ma sweater....crap...all covered up n still cold......hmmmm......i tink i noe y....im in need of sum lovin!!!from ma darling snoogums!where are you where are you????are u hiding unda ma desk???nah cant be....baby....i so miss you.....cum here can can can??hehehehe....

Yeap met her last nite for dinner.....it was really nice....yeah u people must tink im crazy saying dinner is nice rite???dinner is dinner rite???well....i never said i was normal!hahah.....yeap i enjoy havin dinner wit ma baby....yeap even if its for an hour...at least i get to see her...n today..tho i wun be able to see her to ma hearts content*dat gota wait till sat*......im still seeing her!!!weeeeeeeee....dats all dat matters.....yeap...all i wana do is get tis first half of da dae done n ova wit first!....weee....den we can go Bugis together....gosh it seems so long since we last went out...hehehe......bt hu cares....out or at home....we'r oways so lovey dovey...hehehe....yup to da point where we get weird stares wen we go out...hahaha....from hu else???M n Ms of coz....sorie guys....we'r juz not from da same planet as u freaks....n wen i sae freaks...yeah u guys are like those 2 headed aliens walking on mars.....simple terms....so dat u can undastand....ur da shitass kinda freaks...hey...gota explain u noe....coz im a freak too.....but im da nice humane freak....hahahaha.....yeah.....i am....

Boy...dinner was great last nite....had chicken BREASTs last nite at KFC.....so nyum nyum.....hehehe....honey honey can i like wash ur hands again everytime u eat??hehehe....its so nice!!!hehehehe...yeah i love to do all dat for ma princess!!!hahaha....weee....absolutely love tat.....i wana carry her to sleep wen she starts drooling on da sofa....i wana put her in da shower wen she cant get outa bed to get to work...i wana carry her to da toilet wen she needs to wee wee at nite...hehehe....yeap wana do all dat.....yeah dun get jealous of her orite...coz SHE'S WORTH IT!hehehehehe....so love her......n cant wait to haf ma own home wit her!!!!weeeeeee!!!

*Baby baby i so mis u now u noe...n da lesson so boring im falling asleep....i oso hungry bt no one to feed me.....i only want u to feed me....hehehe....n wen i see u later i wana lotsa hugs n kises...okies.......must must must!....i love you lots darlin!!!*

Orite done blogging.....gona try n catch sum sleep now.....ooooooooooopppssssss......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz... :)

2006-01-11T20:13:00.000+08:00

i miss him..lots..tho i met him for dinner just now but its nt enuff...im greedy ..i want to see him always to its not possible...yeah have to live wit it...honey when is that dae gonna come when i can seee u first thing in the morning when im awake n the last person i see when i tuck in..sob sob...im so deprived..very deprived...i need lotsa of love at this time especially at this kind of cold weather..honey y cant u just hide inside my bag? problem solved!! i can see u n u can see me too...hehehehe...good isnt it...n honey yeah we shld be behaving like this always..no more being cranky...we shld be lovey dovey always..after all we r the spore swithearts u noe...thus that makes u the centre of attraction always when we go out...lets just see this sat when we hit town k darling...hehehe...see whether we do get stares frm ppl...esp the M n M..yucks!!!! sowie minahs hes very much taken n yeah he got better taste than that n most importantly u minahs dont fit the bill at all...too bad minahs...hehehe..hes all mine...onli mine...so stop ur staring ...yeah fine i know my honey is hot n yummy but still i dun like it when there r just too many minahs staring at my honey....nak korek mater kape?? juboh btol!!!! honey really cant wait to spend time wit ya this sat..i mean due to the nature of my werking hours we hardly get to go out on weekends...so gonna treasure this weekend u know...must make it a memorable n enjoyable one u knw...hehe...i love ya lots ....

P/S: honey im in serious need of BEn N jERRYS...choc brownie fudge...yummy yummy..hehe...

ok done blogging...will update more soon k...gonna play wit the key as for now...weee...

2006-01-11T11:04:00.000+08:00

Orite baby....i noe i shudnt be doin tis....bt yeah...im skiving during tutorials.....hehehehe......

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Well im gona go see ya later....weeeee......for a dinner date....hw nice...hehehehe.....yeah all is nice rite abt us baby....we've come so so so so very far baby......n i noe.....yeah....n tats a fact.......we can go alot more further...
Juz look at us baby....we got so much tings planned....Lets not even look 4-5 yrs down da road honey....juz look at now...here.....tis very week.....our weekend out.....a first in a long time rite??coz we usually juz haf lotsa sofa time at ur place...hehehehe....*nope not complainin!!*...hehehhe......

N i really tink tis weekend......we will enjoy ourselves im sure..heheh.....lets get sum air!!!!!weeeeeee!!!!n yeah....dun forget Mr Carl, Mr Ben n Mr Jerry....heheheheheheh....i cant wait....so nyum nyum la!!!...heheheh...Muackzzzzzzz......

On a more serious note honey.....

I noe its been tuff for da both of us.....yeah i noe....n all dat was said in both of our blog...will tell both of us alot....yeah baby.....i noe dat at times....u do need assurance whether im will be thr or not.....n yeah those thots do creep in.....bt baby....wateva it is....im stickin....yeah im really stickin wit u....n im gona prove all ur thots wrong...yes...i will.....i will get thru tis wit u....n yes i will walk tis journey wit you....as long as we take care of each otha baby....we noe notin else matters......N i will foreva love you baby......

Yes....at da end of tis all.......like i sae last nite baby.....we will haf dat engagement.....i promise u dat baby....yes its a promise.....i love you lots!!!!Its gona happen.......I will happen....we'll make it happen orite baby....
Im so in love wit u Snoogums....n u mean a whole lot tto me....see even wen im here im still tinkin of you...hehehe.....even wen im in ma sub conscious mind*sleep*......im still tinkin of u....yeah....first ting dats in ma head every morn....its u....n i cant really sae ur da last ting on ma mind before i go to sleep....coz wen im sleepin...or not...ur still there....so thrs nutin else....heheh....ur oways here wit me baby.....always.....n foreva be da one in ma heart......yes Ur dat one....UR D one!.....remember baby...hehehehe....Ur da beholder of da key???heheheheheh.......im glad i gave that away to u....yes....it was rite....its never been so rite......ITS NEVER BEEN LIKE TIS BEFORE......

*I love you lots dear....I really do.....I love u now n foreva....tats a promise baby....i'll never leave you*

{Shites here cum doctor Zhang....okay bye baby...see ya later at 5!hehehe} =)

2006-01-10T19:26:00.000+08:00

I open my eyes
I try to see but I'm blinded by the white light
I can't remember how I can't remember why
I'm lying here tonight And I can't stand the pain
And I can't make it go away No I can't stand the pain
Chorus:
How could this happen to me I've made my mistakes
Got no where to run The night goes on
As I'm fading away I'm sick of this life
I just wanna scream H ow could this happen to me
Everybody's screaming I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I'm slipping off the edge I'm hanging by a thread I wanna start this over again
So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered And I can't explain what happened
And I can't erase the things that I've done No I can't
How could this happen to me I've made my mistakes
Got no where to run The night goes on As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me I've made my mistakes
Got no where to run The night goes on As I'm fading away
I'm sick of this life I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

*i dun know y but this song keeps playing in ma head..it could be the lyrics..it could be just me..it could be the mood..whatever..or maybe it could be that im really sick n tired of all this..*

LIFE IS A TOTAL BITCH..

2006-01-10T14:05:00.000+08:00

im back..the missus of this blog is back..cant blog at hm coz the comp at hm is always down at the wrong moment...while im away so much stuffs happened..sweet..unforgettable..bitter...where shld i start? there are just so many things that i wanna let out...i guess i have to do it here then coz at times saying it out face to face isnt something which im good at..that nite was terrible...awfully terrible...y does it always have to be like that each time we touch on that topic? honey im really sorry for behaving that way..do u think i like all that? do u think i fucking like to see u so down? u know it hurts..awfully hurts...i really cant stand all that...seeing u get all so worked up ...y cant i control my emotions better?
u always asked y i always push u away when probs starts to creep in? honey u want to know the reason y i always keep things to myself when it comes to them...its simple enough...im afraid of losing u...so afraid...very afraid...n the last thing i want to do is to see u all drained..im just afraid that one dae u will leave me not becoz u dun love me anymore but becoz u r just too tired to face all that..i know u always told me that i shld not be even thinking of that possibilty coz its not gonna happen but at times those thoughts do creeps in..n honey when they creeps in they really sits on my head thus explaining that dream which i told ya bout..yeah it has come to that stage where i really do dwell on things..esp when it comes to our relationship...this relationship means a lot to me...n u mean a whole lot more ...n honey seeing u crying so badly just hurts a lot...i really hate all that..its really killing me inside...i hate knowing that i indirectly hurt the feelings of someone who matters a lot to me...at times i just question myself ...did i really make u happy throughout this whole relationship? i mean if i did i wouldnt have let u go thru all those whirlwind emotions...im really sorry honey...at times i just dun know how to make things right again...did i try hard enuff to make u happy? did i try hard enuff to settle the problems? did i care enuff bt ur feelings? am i just too selfish? so many questions but too lil answers..i hate myself for not being able to get things done straight up..if i did all this could have been avoided..i can lose anything in this world but i cannot lose u...u r the source of motivation for me to go thru this life..u r that source of comfort for me..u r everything to me...i dun need to go thru another emotionally drained moment..pls spare me..i really cant..dont put me thru all that aimore...just what is wrong wif u ppl? cant u guys just leave me alone? pls fucking tell me what is the whole fucking point of doing all that? wat kind of satisfaction u get frm all that? cant wait to see me crumble down together wif my relationship? its so not gonna happen..it takes a lot for me to build the relationship..it takes a lot of guts for me to give this relationship n myself a second chance...honey i really love ya lots u know that...for once in my life im taking the right path ...n i want u to be with me always walking down that path..i dun need no one else..i only want u..i want u to take care of me..i want u to feed me..i want u to put me to sleep..i want u to cook for me..i want u to irritate me...i want u to nag at me...basically i just want u to be there always...

done blogging...cant type animore..mental block at tis moment just thinking of wat happened ...arrghhh!!! yeah gonna get a drink to ease my mind as for now...

2006-01-10T01:29:00.000+08:00

Wow!!!!!!!!Wat a turn around......well like they sae....theres always a rainbow after every storm.....yup....hope tat da a storm passes quickly....

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Ok ok.....i dunoe bt i juz cant seem to wipe da smile off ma face...yeah....i started da dae of pretty shitly tats for sure.....*honey im sitll very sorie abt wat happen tis morning baby....*

Yeap i met ma baby snoogums....tis morning....yeap....gave a call n she was like..."honey...tanks....u woke me up at da rite time....im not complainin...." yeah....it was bad dream....yeah....i hate noeing dat dream did creep in....dun dwell too much on it honey...u noe dat they sae that dreams are thots wich are stuck in da back of your mind....dun worry baby...wateva dat u remember from that dream...its not gona happen...u noe baby...im not gona walk out on u...n never will give up on u baby.....

It was a great dae....we managed to get sum productive conversation i guess out of it...yeah....well....at least a small step is still very much a small progress....n i'll take dat in ma stride....bt i really cud not bear it wen....i saw u cried dear after readin thru dat blog......im sorie if u felt low....yeah...i guess....like u sae...let that be a reminder to us both....im sorie dear...pls dun cry like tat no more....i love you u noe baby...

Well amidst all those emotions.....we finally did managed to do wat dis dae was to both of us....da 'kenduri' itself...yes....da tings dat has been on ma mind...her mind...n i haf to sae tis.....mama's mind i guess too...hehehe....well....it really went really well.....i loved it...alot...i mean i finally get to noe faces....see people...most importantly know ur family....n yeah honey...to me....they'r very warm people....i like tat....bt tats not wat im smilin about....da ting is dat.....da main ting for me....was to finally be able to speak to ur dad...i mean i didnt haf a chance to sae a word bt yeah today....it went well i gues...n tanks to ur dad im home early...i really appreciate all tat baby.....

Honey u...n ur family haf done really alot for me baby......n at times....im juz so speechless....ur family treats me so well....im tankful for all that baby...n im not gona disappoint dem for sure baby....coz at da end of da dae...i too want to be part of dat family.....i really really want too......can i can i can i??hehehe....

Baby...at da end of all tis....after last nite...after all those shity times.....i really haf to chuck all tat aside coz i really dun want all tat to affect us baby.....i really dun want too.....so im juz gona take tings at ma chin....Coz now...all i wana do is juz concentrate on da engagement..n being part of ur family....n all tis problems.....we haf to face it too honey......bt for now....im juz gona savour tis sweet moments again....

Well....im goan go 2 daes without u again...n dat suck big big time......gile gile gile!bt baby.....i really love you...i want u to noe dat...coz dats a fact baby....i love you...n im here to stay...to stay.....all for you.....Muackzzzz!

2006-01-09T01:49:00.000+08:00

*Anotha favourite song....Our LAdy Peace-BRING bACK tHE suN*

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Little white house
It's everything we dream about
We wanted you to know
I'm hanging up my e-go...
We shouldn't have to fight
Or worry about the bills tonight
I wanted you to know
I wanna be your shadow

Mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Oh bury this hate
Build it with love
The mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Oh bury this hate
Build it with love, ho oh

Little batter high
Grass wasn't greener I found
Wanted you to know
Well I dug you up a rainbow

Mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Oh bury this hate
Build it with love
The mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Oh bury this hate
Build it with love[guitar solo]

And I know
I know I failed you
And I hope
I hope we get through
Show me your hand again

And I know
I know I failed you
And I hope
I hope we get through
Soul signed hand
Mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Bury this hate
Build it with love

The mystery's gone
So bring back the sun
Oh bury this hate
And build it with love
The mystery is gone
The mystery is gone
The mystery's gone
The mystery is gone mmm hmmm
The mystery's gone

Bring back the sun
Bury this hate
Build it with love
Little white house

2006-01-09T01:43:00.000+08:00

*Tis song reflects....ma feelings.....wen im down.....always....*

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I can't sleep tonight
Everybody saying everything's alright
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of all these lights

Sunny days
Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning

I can't stand myself
I'm being held up by an invisible man
Still life on a shelf when
I got my mind on something else

Sunny days
Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Why does it always rain on me?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning

Oh, where did the blue skies go?
And why is it raining so?
It's so cold I can't sleep tonight
Everybody's saying everything's all right
Still I can't close my eyes
I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of the lights

Sunny days
Where have you gone?
I get the strangest feeling you belong
Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?
Even when the sun is shining
I can't avoid the lightning

Oh, where did the blue skies go?
And why is it raining so?
It's so cold
Why does it always rain on me?
Why does it always rain on....

2006-01-09T01:01:00.000+08:00

Well...juz got off da phone....n decided to type tis blog....dun ask me y.....bt i juz dun fell very rite at times....

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Yeap conversation's over...well....we touched on a very raw topic again....touched on those raw nerves i guess...n u noe hw u feel wen it happens...well im not complainin...i mean...all tis are part n parcel of a relationship...its true...a little down..gets u sumwhere far as u uncover more unchartered territories....its hard...bt life gota move on....yeah rite...wateva....

Its tuff noeing dat we still do haf a problem at hand...i mean i did managed to do ma best so as to not stuck ma nose in....bt i cant help it...at times...i really can sense sumtins brewing sumwhere....bt me being me...i juz cant bring maself to ask abt sumtin we both hate talkin abt...coz its juz downrite taxing...n its never productive...its juz not one of those stuff....where can be settle straight up i guess...

N tat conversation juz now....juz sort of tell me tat wat ive been tinkin of all along is true...n hw i hate dat so much...yes i noe dear...i noe hes not gona let u off tat easily....i noe tat...u dun haf to hide to as to protect me from breaking down again.....i noe ur doin dis for ma sake....bt i cant help it...i juz noe...

At times i juz wonder to myself...wat haf i really really done to deserve tis??really can sumone please tell me....i mean wat....juz becoz i didnt make sum of ma relationships work out...tis is wat i deserve??wat goes ard cums ard???...well it already did....too many times...even before tis relationship....i mean...hw much more time does it really haf to go ard????????

Its really draining....i remember...sitting on ma own....on a rooftop....tinkin to maself once....y does tings happen da wae tings happen....n da next dae...da truth was out...i was outa of relationship....n dat makes me wonder even more....y take away sumtin dat u gave me.....n i cant find dat answer myself....

N it juz brings back so much bitter memories....so much of it...hw much i suffered....n i noe...at tis time of ma life....i really wudnt be able to take it...if tings juz turn out da same wae again...i really cant afford to go thru thos times again...its draining...it hurts....n its painful.....too painful...really painful...n da recovery...tell me....honestly...i never really did recover fully.......i really doubt i did...if not..i wudnt be feeling like tis so often....so afraid of tings falling apart...so afraid of losing da most important ting in ma life....so afraid of broken promises...so afraid of empty hopes....so afraid of it all......yes im really afraid.....its too much on me for it too happen again....wae too much...coz i noe....if it did...i will not juz fall apart....im dead...buried.....

Every time i tot.....i cud get sumwhr in a relationship....theres juz da same problem happening...everytime i go n really love sumone deeply wit all ma heart....it juz falls apart.....hw many more times do u me to go thru tis??tell me...tell me pls pls pls....

Bt im gona tell u sumtin...i had enuff of all ur games....all ur trying....im done....im gona go thru tis relationship....coz i noe...tis relationship is not like those ones in da past...i noe....n im realy gona put in efforts i nvr did before...im nvr gona give u up....im not gona let anitin affect tis...coz at da end of da dae....tis is ma life...tis is where ma heart is...tis is where i kept ma soul....n tat is tis relationship itself....

N for once....for once in ma life.....im really begging....im begging....yes im really am begging....im really am begging.....pls...juz for tis once....juz for tis relationship....pls...dun destroy it.....n pls...dun let othas too....im really begging............ =*(

2006-01-08T14:38:00.000+08:00

Damn!!!!!!!Okay....da plan was to do da postin last nite....bt uh....on second tots...n since ma baby'c comp is down...i decided to do it today instead...

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Gosh its been a rainy 2 daes.....n altho im a big fan of the rain....not tis 2 daes...coz im missing ma dearie snoogums so so badly....i haven seen her in 2 daes now....Y??y does it haf to be like tis!........

Yeah....tis is a first time in a long long time dat im not seein her....2 daes consecutively....n boy isnt dat fucking terrible!....gets me all cranky and stuff....Im really missin her so much now....eespecially even more 2dae...coz i tink after going thru da whole of yesterday solo.....N NOT GOING THRU SMOOTHLY.....i really doubt i can go thru today unscathed....haiz....i still got anotha 24 hrs to go.....haiz haiz haiz.....

Well at least she did left me sumtin to at least hold n cuddle wen im missin her....*okay tat wud mean every second*...its her blazer!!!!gosh...u wudnt wanna noe wat ive done to it...*nah im gona tell ya aniwae*...first wen i woke up yest...i took da blazer outa wardrobe....n was walkin ard da house cuddlin it...hey!cant help it...dat tings still has her smell even tho i washed it*okay peeps tat doesnt mean she stinks okay!...she smells really nice*....n last nite before i tuck into bed...i took it out again n went to sleep wit it...n guess wat?...wen i woke up tis afternoon...i was actually cuddlin da blazer rather den da bolster.....hehehe...yeah im crazy....ma mama said tat too....hehehe....i really miss her alot...i really do....sumtime i wish she wud juz be here wit me all dae...or ib there wit her all dae...bt.....nah...tats juz a fantasy....a fantasy tat wud be reality in da later parts of our lives...

Well before we both went our separate wae on friday*wen i went home n she went home* we had tis serious talk on our engagement....for once we touched on a topic that we nvr touched before tis...whether we both wud still be there after da whole engagemnt in 2007....n i tink i did get sum tings off ma chest n she got sum answers to ease her mind on stuff....

Honestly i myself been dwelling an awful lot before i came to da decision to go thru wit tis engagement plan...n i honestly know that i can go ahead wit this....no doubts animore...n i can sae tat im dead certain about where i wana go with tis relationship...i really to tings thru...n like i said to her...i only got one shot at tis relationship n to where we wana go n da engagement ting itself..so im not gona waste tis...yes wen i sae one shot...i really haf only one...coz i honestly cant find anione beta den ma baby at all...n im dead sure of that....n tis is a big deciosion to cum to as well as it juz doesnt involve me and her...it involves our family...n im sure for others...tis wud be added pressure...bt for me...i dun deny it is...bt like i said...tis is a necessary form of pressure...in otha words...a source of motivation to get as far as possible in tis relationship....n ive made ma mind up...at da end of da dae...i can only see settling down in dat little white house wit tis beautiful lady in ma life now...n ur never be replaced baby...there can only be u in ma heart....for now....n forever....

Well baby...we got so much tings going on for us...so many tings planned ahead...n im sure we can achieve all that baby...coz its not ridiculous...n its not beyond our reach.....we can go places baby...n we can do all da tings we wana do!we can we can we can.....

N eventually...it will all cum to a head cums 2007 wen we cap off tis relationship wit our engagement....n den...we can start our lifes fresh...as we haf cum to our second stage of tis whole relationship.....n by den...im sure...we wud haf more tings planned.....

I love you lots baby....i really love you so much....n of tis moment.....i missing u terribly......n as im typin tis blog....im still cuddlin ur blazer...n yeah.....by da time u get it back...its gona start smellin like me instead of u...hehehe.....i love you baby!lots lots lots lots...........Muackzz!!!

2006-01-08T13:08:00.000+08:00

FUCK...its fucking raining just now n im kinda wet rite now..hahaha...n im late for werk as well..coz that good fren of mine kept me waiting for her..n to get back at her i make her walk outside in the rain wit me coz i love playing in the rain ...tat explains y im late for werk n y im drenched...cool isnt it...talking bout the rain nothing beats the time when im caught in the rain wit him on our anniversary..yeah i know we r both crazy but we love the rain a lot for some strange reasons...kissing in the rain? tats totally HOT!!! yeah we actually did all that..i absolutely love all that ...in tis kind of weather it makes me misses him even more..aargghhh!!!! `it has never been like this before` hehehe...but heck one dae to go and once im done wit todae itself i would be finally be able to see him tmr....weeeee!!!! but im still sore over the god damn spoilt weekends of mine for this whole fucking mnth....yesh yesh im still all sore n sour...cant help it..my love life is definitely way much more interesting than their pathetic shit ass life...yesh yesh im still sore....honey save me...ur girlfren is goin bonkers coz she misses u like crazeeeeee!!!!! im gone...so gone...hehehe...
received a miss call frm him late last nite...i didnt pick it up for obvious reasons...then got a stupid irritating msg frm him...cmon u idiot just leave me alone..i dun need u at all at this very point of time in my life...just get over me n move on...if i can just let go of all our memories i dun see y u cant do just that..i have always been the one who is emotionally attached in our relationship n if i can do just that y cant u just let me go?!!!! n u know wat idiot im done wit ya..im so over ya..im tired of ya...i dun wanna u to distrupt my life so stop watever u r trying to do...all along i never asked anything frm u but this time ard pls just let me live my life happily...is it so hard for u to grasp the fact that im happier wit someone else? or is it just ur fucking ego like usual? the fact that u r losing me to someone else is so overwhelming that u r so bent of ruining my happiness wit him...y does it have to that way? im not the liza u think i am..im so done wit ur game..im much wiser now..n im not gonna crawl back to ya the way i used to..u idiotic egoistic fucker im happy now and im super in love wit my current boifren n for ur info hes gonna be my fiance in a matter of time..yeah get that in ur head...im happily attached to SYED JUFRI...n if u not gonna leave me alone i mite just go over n kill u..i will kill u...i will kill u...

honey honey i am in so in love wit ya u know...do u love me that much honey? n i miss u like crazee u know that...muackzzzz!!!!!

2006-01-07T19:23:00.000+08:00

FUCK!!!! its so fucking boring here at werk n tats y im here blogging while werking..its even more shitty since im not meeting him..arrghhh!!!...tat goes for tmr as well...fucking pm shift..so fuck up..my entire weekends for this whole mnth of january screwed up so much coz im werking pm shift all the way..y cant they all just rot n die while planning the roster for us?stupid fucking bitches!!!! i hate u all!!! if u think weekends r just meant aside for u married ppl..think again..i bet my life is way much better than ur pathetic sorry ass married life coz honestly i need the weekends more than u bitches do..so pls get that in ur bloody head before i start toying wif the idea of skinning u ppl alive ..infested it wif ants n just wait n let u all rot n die...i mean u wouldnt want to know that ur fellow colleague which is me (yeah thats me.. i may have an innocent look but i do have evil thoughts) can be that pyschotic at times..trust me i will...
yeah i miss him...tat explains my mood at this fucking moments coz im not seeing him till mondae..have to go thru it anyway..i wonder whether he misses me as much as i do..nah dun have to wonder ..hes just like me..we miss each otha like crazy when we cant be near each otha...n peeps guess wat? he actually cuddles wit my blazer just now at hmm...hahahah...how sweet of him...i like that..i love ya honey..i really do..i dreamt of us just now i the morning but had to be rudely woken up by this stupid irritating alarm clock of mine...AAARRGGHHH!!!!! cmon dun be such a spoiler y cant u stupid alarm at least rings after im finally done wif the dream..i guess was really into the dream..i mean i dun drool when im sleeping as a matter of fact unless when im seriously tired or when im so into my sleep or in that particular case the dream..hahaha...
had a serious talk wif him last nite ..mostly bout the engagement thingy...focusing on my feelings n my concerns..honey i do really want to get there wit ya u know...its just that at times i do hav that stupid funny thots like whether u can really be there after 2007 itself..its not that i dun trust u..i trust u a lot..its just that when u hold someone so dear in ur heart u tend to be afraid that one dae they mite just leave u all alone..n honey just that thoughts alone can drives me up tha wall...i dun enjoy that a single but..not at all in fact..i guess i do need assurance every now n then..i cant afford to go thru another whirlwind relationship..its really taxing on me..taxing on my emotions...taxing on my life..n honey i trust that u wont put me through all that ..like i sae im putting all hopes on this relationship...this is the relationship which i want to keep till the end..n u r the last person i want to fall in love with...i said it lots of times,..i just cant seem to visualise of anyone who is capable of loving me as much as u do..i really cant...coz i cant think of myself in the arms of another person as well....we got so much goin on for us..n its just not logical to even think or toying wif the idea of risking this relationship coz its just not us...honey honey lets just work hard n keep our focus in the rite track ok..n honey i really do need u in my life in all aspect..i mean a life without u is as good as bein dead..i can lose evrything in this life but i cant lose u honey...i really cant..so honey lets go thru 2006 together creating more sweet moments for us to remember...

I LOVE YA!!!

2006-01-06T00:00:00.000+08:00

Okay....u noe y no postin last nite even tho it was ma bdae????hehehe......coz celebration wasnt over til today....hehehe.....*n maybe becoz i was too caught up wit da damn CN paper*

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Yeah....tis is da best bdae i eva had since i dunnoe wen....coz i nvr actually had a bdae celebration n bdaes....r like any otha daes...bcoz no one seems to care hw old i was...*not tat i care too...hehehe*....bt not tis year...

Tis year......wow...first tings first....it started very brightly with da new year celebration n stuff.....hehehe.....bt i didnt tot ma bdae wud be dis great....n so meaningful....bcoz of a special person in ma life....hu took so much effort in tryin to make da best of ma bdae...n before i go further....*TANKS BABY....U MADE MA 20th BDAE DA ONE OF DA BEST EVER DAES.....*

SINGAPORE'S SWEETHEART INVADES JOHOR BAHRU
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Well we went to JB for ma bdae....well it was planned quite sumtime ago...cept dat we were also dwellin on da tot of goin to da zoo too.....tats a first u noe coz ma bdae has oways been very much low key n impromptu....i absolutely love tis dae...so there we were 2 lovey dovey couple making our way there to JB....yeah ever since we went there da otha time round...we sort of got a whole different impression of da whole place...eventho its literally full of crap all ova....

Den we decide to xplore da whole of City Square...bt being us....we juz didnt haf enuff time to go all da wae ard da shoppin centre....hahaha....*we were to caught up wit going up n down of da escalators....*
Bt hey......guess wat...we got more yummy chocsz....n darlin werent we surprise tat da salesgal still remember us....tanks MA COCA CHOCZ...u guys rock...love their chocs...honey can we haf that every we go to JB???pls pls pls!!!

Bt dats not all....*hey wat do u xpect all good stuff dun end u noe*.....we found a new fav haunt....VIVO Rest!!!.....wow.....gosh da foods there yummy....*we actually planned to take da picts wen da food arrive....bt we were to caught up eatin....so we decided to leave u guys wit empty plates instead....hey at least u guys get da idea on how yummy da food was!!!*

Bt u noe wat.....tats not da ting i wana tell u guys abt....coz no matter hw much good food we eat.....no matter wherever we go...i juz wana tell u guys da only reason yest was so enjoyable...*n everydae too*...was becoz of da fact da i was wit ma baby all dae...tis is da first time i was actually spendin ma bdae wit a loved one...n honestly...even if we were to haf instant noodles at home....i wudnt mind a single bit....coz as long as da daes spent wit ma baby Nur....its enuff....quality time....its always quality....

Well if da bdae itself was great...i really didnt see this coming....bt ma Mama-in-Law...*wow hmmmm*....decided to celebrate it too...da next dae...honestly im so touched...i nvr tot it wud get to tis.....im juz so touched by tat gesture....well like u sae darling....i haf to learn tat coz...we'r family now....bt still...im very very touched by tat gesture....tanks mama....

N at da end of da nite...well....tis is da icing on da cake for me...*xcuse da pun*.....
We manage to sit down n talk to mama about our engagement.....n trust me...it felt good for me....for us...n tink for her too....hehehe....so xciting!....i tink now.....people can really see tat we'r serious on settling down....well baby....im serious....n im ready for ya!I love you baby.....lets go....2007!

*Once again....*altho tis may sound real formal bt no...its me at ma gracious best*......i really wana tank u ma baby....n ur family as well for all da tings u guys hav done for me tis past two daes...u made me feel at home...really.....i love you darling....n i cant wait for nect year...lets haf more good times tis year orite darlin!*

2006-01-05T23:35:00.000+08:00

wow...what a great 3 days it has been...its really nice having to spend real quality time wif him..finally we r rite on track..no more of those cranky moments...i swear we wont get anymore of those coz we just dun need all that at this point of time..PERIOD!! well well yesterdae was his big dae..i think my honey is still tryin to grasp the fact that he is oredi 20..hahaha...honey honey its nt that bad u knw..20 is a really cool age..not too young n not too old..had a blst yesterdae spending time over at the causeway..hey dun look at JB in the same manner animore k..trust us..when all gets too hectic over here just bring ur ass over there..it really werks..i mean it werks for us so we r not complaining..we kinda wanted a quiet n mellow outing so we decided to go over ..n boy it was really mellow..less hectic n chaotic..perfect for what we wanted all along..nice way to spend time together..n there we discover a new fav eating place for us..courtesy frm VIVO..hehe..boy the food is super duper damn delicious..n surprise surprise the gerl at that choc shop oh well whatever that shop name is .. still remember us??!! i mean what the heck...we really do love their chocs but the thing is we actually went there once which was a mnth ago...hahaha...doesnt that says a lot bt us? do we really leave that kind of lasting impression? heck...couldnt care less..coz bottomline they really do sell yummy chocs..superb delicious..really love the bailey wine flavour..honey honey shall we go over there soon n stock up on more of those chocs? pls pls pls darling?!!
todae outing wif him kinda different..hmm...shall put it as a family outing i guess...hehehe...i love that..wonder whether he enjoys tat as well..u knw wat? my mom bought for him that black BOSSINI shirt for him as a bdae gift...n yeah let me tell ya he look really great wearing tat..trust me..absolutely yummy when he wears something like that..cant wait to see him in tat..hehehe...i do love looking at him u knw..hey like i say the other time..i have an obsession bt him...i cant help it...what can i do when im so madly in love wif him? is that a crime? a flat no of coz...oh yeah had a nice meal over at LETS EATZ...hehehe...but mom can u pls stop condemning that place for whatever reasons there is?!! hehehe..went hm after all that...n yeah we finally did have a talk ..a proper talk ..on the topic of our engagement..yeah we r really that serious bt each other..no joke peeps..hes all mine..all mine..n that engagement gonna happen sometime next year in 2007..it could be earlier half or later half of the year..but whatever it is its definitely gonna happen..im so sure of it..so peeps just look out for that dae k n do make urself free on that particular day..hehehe...i cant deny it..i am really in love this time round..never felt like so strongly like this before for anyone..i cant explain it into words..like i told my mom the other time..i can really trust my life wit him..i know he can take care of me well..i know even if the whole world is bent on bringing me down i know i still can run to him n find comfort in him..it has come to a point where i just need him to be ard me always..i really do love him..n yeah honey..u always ask me am i really ready for the commitment? i am ready honey..i am ready to embrace a new life wit ya..i am ready to start a new page wif ya..to start a new chapter wif ya..n i really cant wait for 2007 to come..it so gonna be different for us..the starting point of something major for us..n i knw for a fact that we can do it honey..its just not all talk frm us..we can get there ..its onli a matter of time..n honey i know i did make a rite decision on whom i wanna be with..if my love for u can be measured i guess it would be as vast as the ocean..but the thing is my love for ya cant be measured coz its a continuous cycle..so tell me how can it be measured?if that is possible then it would be an understatement..n i knw for a fact in our case its not like that..PERIOD!! honey honey...having u in my life rite now is a blessing...u r a gift sent frm above..n i so gonna treasure that gift ...tho i wish i know u earlier but still at this very moment im not complaining coz the wait has been worthwhile for me..if going thru all possible shits u can think of to finally reach a blissful destination..then in my case i am really thankful that i did go thru all shits..i mean look at me now..i couldnt ask for more in my life rite now..coz having u rite here with me is the best thing that i could ever ask for..in fact i think He gave me more than what i asked for..he gave me someone who can completes me...n GOD if one dae u shld decide to take all that away frm me..i would have to really beg u then...u can take anything else frm me even my life but pls not a life without him ..honey i really love ya lots u knw..i would never ever take u for granted or trade u wit anything else in this world..n yeah i wanna be wit to go thru this journey wit me together...side by side holding hands n never to let go..EVER!! its a promise frm me honey...love ya...muackzz...

2006-01-03T00:23:00.000+08:00

shit i am missing him oredi..cant stand it when hes nt by my side..gone..im so gone..ahakz..i am so in love..i absolutely love him to bits..done toking..im crazy..yes all crazy for him..i love ya honey munchkinz!!!

2006-01-02T14:13:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year...Happy New YEar.....wow....wat a year huh.....bt heck......lets embrace 2006 now....its hear....*ok damn....tat means im juz 2 daes away from leaving teenage years....im old!!!*

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Well wat a year 2005 was...finally...after all da celebrations and da end of da"hell" week tat i had....i finally haf sum time to reflect on wat was 2005 all about.......

Wat can i sae huh abt 2005?...well honestly....2005 was pretty much a shit ass year for me...yes it was....life cudnt haf been much worse den it was at da beginning of da year...slowly Jufri WAS disintegrating...bt heck....it was not strong enuff to destroy Jufri....*look at where i am now...still staring at da sun....da stars*

On a whole....2005 n da year before..*which is 2004 for those hu cant remember dates* was terrible for me....yeah....i went thru shites..school....family....friends....relationship...n believe it or not....football...yes crisis u ask?yeah....crisis it was...internally....life was falling apart....bt hey....i need to tell u sumtin....coz eventho life was falling apart...i did see a glitter of hope.....a little spot of happiness.....in a friend...hu eventually become...someone very special to me....yes she changed ma life....well i noe u wudnt undastand wat i mean by tat...bt i noe...da two person hu can xplain hw much i change ma tinkin wud be ma bestfren if u can find him...coz da Jufri dat was ard during 2004/2005 haf very much faded or drowned to da bottomless pit of tis world.....

At times i dunnoe hw i can actually be able to resist maself from crumbling all da wae...i really wonder how i can...considerin tat i was really tinkin tat life was over wen she walked out...considerin tat family was juz a name given to a group of people staying in da same house n nutin more...considerin tat i cant even do simple mathematics in school coz ma minds not there...considerin i juz cant even kick a ball animore...i dun even noe wat was a pass!!.....yeah...life was tat bad....yeah....i lost it there and den...bt like i sae it wud take more den dat to kill me...n i tot i cud turn tings ard in 2005 by juz being a little bit happier den usual...bt NO.....there are juz people ard me hu cant wait to see Jufri fall to da floor n haf a chance to step all over da bastard tat they tink i was....haha....man didnt u guys failed big time!yeah i fell....bt u guys were da ones dat got stepped on eventually...

Bt like i sae....amidst all tis i did seek a little solace in a friend....a virtual friend at first....yes...she was goin thru wat i was too...bt we juz didnt let it out in da open....coz we'r so alike....we dun share our problems...coz u noe y?in dis world theres juz not many trustworthy people...n theres juz too many fake people...bt well....wat a friendship it was for us.....a beautiful frenship tat many wud envy....n to cap it all off....we didnt stop there...

Coz there very friend tat i was tokin about...is no otha den ma baby herself...yup....we went thru shites...yes our lives are not a s fine n dandy as u tink it is....bt hey...nutin can bring us down...coz u noe y?coz we'r strong people....

N yeah honestly baby....I tink u noe wat we went thru....we did go thru shits...trust me wen i sae its shit....it was really shit....bt let me tell u sumtin...dun get too xcited huh....da shits dat we go thru was not becoz of da fact dat we hate each otha...no becoz of da fact dat we dun love each otha....bt its becoz of in dis world...there are juz way too many people hu are downrite selfish n wud do everytin they cud to get da happiness tat they want without tinkin of otha peoples feelings....yeah its shit....bt im no god...i cant change everyone....bt i can do sumtin abt it....remember da names of tis people baby???remember nadia?remember ur ex?remember fauzie?remember dos staring incidents??yes...all tis is still etched in ma mine...bt u noe wat....THEY'R NOT GONA BRING US DOWN....it will never happen coz i wun let it happen....yes 2006 is a new year baby....so lets start afresh.....

Yeah honey.....i loved da wae we spent new years together....i was really really really nice, sweet and simple....*for your info peeps....its da first time for da both of us dat we'r celebrating new years together*....everytin abt da nite was impromptu....it was really a great nite rite baby....unda da colorful sky filled wit fireworks...we were having drinks and hugging and kissing by da river..i loike!

n yeah da best part of da nite has to be da part wen we spend da nite together....cuddling....hugging.....kissing...n yeah...sleeping.....*i still remember da sounds....haha*n to cap it all off.....yes tis is big big ting da we tok abt...yeah we haf oways been serious about each otha....n trust us guys...wen we'r serious....we really are...yeap we already made plans to settle down....5 years from now....we really did...bt dat one ting dat i was tokin abt tat really made new years dae all worthwile...was da fact dat we toked about getting ENGAGED....yes we did....n u noe wat....we'r not tinkin of it....WE ARE going for it...yes we started planning oready.....n i cant believe it....im gona get engaged....coz honestly...im not da biggest fan of tis at all...until da dae tis old men told me abt da true meanings about gettin engaged i really started to tink of it...n like i told u baby...i want to do tis as much as u want it....yeah dead serious....so lets juz concentrate on gettin there orite baby.....n we'll talk abt our plans in detail later wen i meet u k baby......*im so lookin forward for tat dae*

Yeah....life's changed....im on tis journey with a different perspective now...suddenly da sun never shine brighter...suddenly im no longer lookin at da ligth at da end of da tunnel....coz im out of da tunnel...n da ligths on me....n yeah.....Jufri....is no longer da guy u tink u noe...*yeah i still look arrogant...no doubt....my baby told me so....* hes changed....trust me...he did.....

Baby baby....i love u so much u noe darlin u noe....i really do....so baby.....Wud u be ma fiancee??

*its da second step oready....next time round....i need to go down on one knee n pop anotha question...hehehe*

2006-01-02T00:47:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR PEEPS!!

yesh finally 2006 is here...it means i can finally close 2005 wif ease..personally
2005 wasnt a really great year for me..i have just too many problems to settle n come to terms with..the one thing tat i can be proud of wat i do in the year 2005 was the fact tat i could actually let go of my previous relationship wif him..its really a hard year for myself when it comes to my relationship wif him..n im really glad i can just let go of all of it..those times..those memories wif him..its not tat im thinking of him at this very moment as im typing this..its just tat im reflecting on what i have done especially in relationship aspect..as im reflecting on my past wif him at times i just have to be grateful for all the shit ass things i gone thru wif him..n when i sae shit ass trust me it really is...coz if everything were fine n dandy between us i would nt be where i am now in terms of relationship wise..i am happy at this very moment..way much happier..i couldnt ask for more..i am really in love at this very moment..im proud of the fact tat i can actually took a risk to leave out frm tat comfort zone of mine..but hey im nt complaining coz its been a wise decision of mine n im not regretting it a single bit...god is kinda fair to me in tat sense...i had a blast last nite...u knw wat?i celebrate new year wif my loved one..hehehe..kinda contradicting myself but heck arr pls cut me some slack lah..im not the same liza..i must say tat my new relationship really change me a lot..not only i have mellow down but the way i look at things change too..i am so in love wit him tat at times i just wish i have him for myself every dae..it may sound freaky but i really do miss him a lot if i dun get to see him..as freaky as tat may sounds trust me my honey is way much freakier...he can still dream bt me even tho im rite there sleeping beside him..hahaha...im nt complainin u knw dearie..it just goes to show tat u really love me tat much..dear i had a reallt nice outing last nite tho its kinda slack but i like the whole idea of us spending real quality time together in a not so hectic environment..dear thnks for all tat..really means a lot to me..shall do tat every year k..n the thing is most of it was very impromptu ..the highlight of the nite i must say is the cuddling up moments..it really werks for us..im not goin to let another external factors to affect the relationship..i guess enuff is enuff arr...i dun need any more n furthermore we dun need any xtra attention..n honey i still cant figure it out how the hell the topic of engagement pops up?weird but true...n honey i am really placing a lot of my hopes in this relationship..honey u really have to get me out frm here coz im done wif home dear..u r my only hope as for now..i dun mean to add any pressure or watsoever but i just cant seem to think of anyone else doin a better job than u..in fact i cant even see myself bein wif someone else..if i have got the best thing here rite in front of me y do i even need to bother bt others??coz honey u really means a lot to me..u really do..n all tat talk bout the near future of where we r heading come 2007 im dead serious bt it honey..i really want us to werk hand in hand to get there...we need each other to get there..the whole talk of tat topic alone change my perspective of my life itself..honey ever since u came into my life i couldnt be more blessed..all this while im just floating in life without a real purpose..but now its all different i am here in this life wit a purpose..a big purpose..n it can only be make possible wif u ard here wit me honey..n like we always sae our relationship is just not a relationship alone..it means so much more than that which is true..we do have a reason y we r here 2gether..i just want us to have a better future together honey...i guess we r done wif all shit ass stuffs goin on wif our life personally..so honey lets hold hands n embrace 2006 n watever coming year together k darlin munchkinz..

i love u darling..n yeah peeps i got a confession to make..i am very obsessed wif my honey..no joke bout tat..TO ALL GERLS HE IS VERY MUCH TAKEN..HES ALL MINE..MINE..MINE..MINE..N CAN ONLY BE MINE ALONE..SO PLS GET TAT IN UR BLOODY SHIT ASS HEAD..IF NOT I GONNA SKIN U GERLS ALIVE INFESTED IT WIF ANTS N LET IT ROT..GAME ENUFF FOR TAT BITCHES?!!!!
big thnks n CHEERS!!

2005-12-30T01:23:00.000+08:00

Okay everybody!..................Yeah now im in a much better state n i tink i can post a proper blog now...*no more pain...no more tears*

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Yeah like i said in da last postin, it was a shitty two 2 daes for me...n for her...

Finally for me...i can see myself....my dat one self of me...tat i always been wonderin about ever since i step foot in tis relationship....so many questions tat i had for myself....now....ive got all da answers....i dunoe y...bt at da start i do question myself alot...no on da matter of happiness tat i can give...bt wen ur in need....can i raise myself above all emotions n circumstances to hold tis relationship together n to be able to raise da spirits...

Yeah....n finally after dis few daes of lotsa shit ass toks n problems....i tink i haf no reason to doubt myself no more....tank u god!i helps to noe tat fact...

N it also boils down to tis....i juz cant take it wen i see my baby so worked up....so worried....so drained.....it hurts...it pains me.....it brings me down....yes....as strong as i can be....im human after all....i do breakdown and cry...yes....im not afraid to cry....im not a superhuman...

Baby....i noe dat yeah it kinda freaks u out at times dat i juz noe u too well...bt honey...i tink isnt dat wats a relationship is abt??noeing each otha....yeah maybe for me...i noe u too well...too fast...heck....all da beta..hehehe....bt yeah honey....noeing u too well too leads me to hw i handle tings i guess.....coz i noe...ur emotionally affected honey....n one ting too...i hate da fact da people exploit dat for their own gain.....selfish prickz...i hate all of ya....honey please dun let dem do all dat to you...coz u noe....u dun need dat kinda ting...n yeah...dun eva let people belittle u....ur more den dat baby.....u r more den dat....ur much stronger den u tink u are....n yeah dun let people pull u away from tis relationship....u noe its not worth it honey....

yes one month long is short...bt remember honey....in dat one month we haf built sumtin dat othas wud take years to achieve....our bonding...is so...unbreakable no matter wat da case....honey..even before tis...we've been thru shites....yes tis is da mama of all shits...bt honey...aint no mountain high enuff...n tis aint no problem we cant overcome...n look at where we are now.....we'r done....n at da end of da dae....i juz want u to be tat lovely bubbly gal tat i noe....so baby....lets put 2005 to a close....n lets enjoy 2006 together....no nutin....no problems....no nutin....pls pls pls......yeah at dis point im really am begging for all tis to end....i cant take it animore honey....i really cant....maybe i will be ready to handle tis wen 2006 cums....n afta dat short planned break...hehehehe.....*im so lookin forward too dat*

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n finally....i haf to sae tis....straight up....coz i dun care animore...i really dun...

For all u crazy shitass jokers out there......u people/individuals....r really really really startin to piss me off.....n yeah.....ITS NEVER BEEN LIKE TIS BEFORE....so im gona give u a warning....yes look here....WARNING!.....n its final.....get ur shitty ass from OUR relationship....before i put u peeps outta of it for good.....yes i had enuff.....done tokin.....

Tankz....n CHeers......

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N baby...i really love you so much darling....i really do......n i'll never let u go....baby no matter wat...im here for you...juz for you....n no ones gona take me away....be it crayz goth people....or juz *org-org sakit*......i love you baby!

2005-12-30T00:19:00.000+08:00

dear peeps..i know its been a long time since i update this blog especially after my anniversary..haiz...all i can sae its been a rather shitty days for me personally ..it was so shitty to the point where its affecting my relationship wif my dear..haiz...liza liza liza...it has never been like this before???

well peeps when i sae shitty i did not mean tat my anniversary celebration was shitty too coz it wasnt..it was a very sweet n memorable one..honey i really love tat place u knw..lets go there n chill when we r really tired of this world which is full of freaky characters k..coz i think sitting over there really helps us a lot..n honey tho tat dae itself didnt really start particularly well..we do make it it all up at nite during our exchanging gifts moments..for once we were rite on track ...for once we were ourselves..for once we were just into our own world..honey the gift ta u got me really means a lot to me..i mean its a promise ring..it just says a lot isnt it...n tat ring gonna stick wit me forever no matter what...as long as im here the ring gonna stays...i love u lots darling..u mean a lot to me..not forgetting the ring alone,u gave me ur key..as much as it means a lot to u it means a lot to me too dear..the fact tat u gave me away the key makes me realise one thing..tat i really want to stick wit u no matter what..in good n bad times..i want to be tat person who is always there for u honey n i know for a fact tat i can do really well in being tat person for u..im nt gonna screw up somewhere n risk the relationship coz its just not worth it..at the end of the dae u mean an awful lot to me honey...without u here its as good as being dead..its true..without u there in my heart im just dead inside..devoid of emotions..coz i just cant carry on wit life without u..n when i tell ya tat i really need u to be ard always ..trust me i really do need u ard in all aspect of my life coz u r a part of me now..a part of my life ..a part of my heart..a part of my soul...a part of my mind..u r everywhere i go..its true..

honey do u think i like being the way i am for the past 2 fucking daes?for ur info n u peeps out there...i dun like it a single bit..it hurts me knowing tat i can actually be so affected wif my problems ..so caught up wif my problems tat im pushing u away unknowingly...i hate all tat honey..i hate knowing tat i hurt ur feelings..i hate to see u cry..i hate to see u get so worked out ..i hate all tat..coz at the end of the dae how u feels really affects me as well..i just want u to be happy..each time u shed ur tears for our relationship ..do u knw how much it pains me just to look at u being like tat? i honestly hate tat...i just dun want u to be upset..n i really hate myself for nt containing my emotions well...i hate myself for letting my probs get the better of me..i hate myself for nt being able to pick myself up n face the probs the way i always do..y do i have to be such a shitass the past few days?? aarrrgghhh...!!!!!!!

honey im really grateful tat u r there for me ...u have been a great source of motivation for me to move on..for me to get on wif life as usual..for me to face all the shitass things bravely..u knw y i can finally tell myself tat i can do all tat? coz i knw for a fact for once in my life tat im nt alone in goin thru a harsh period of my life coz u r there for me in every single step..i knw that if i do fall u r there for me to lift me up..im really thankful for tat honey..it means a lot to me..at the end of the dae no matter how harsh my dae is..i can tell myself tat when i do go hm i have someone there waiting for me to gv me comfort..love..hope..motivation..n tat person is none other than u honey...all this while i`ve never actually have tat someone to fall back on when i do have probs but now u r here for me i couldnt ask for more except to tell myself tat im really blessed....i can even thank god for giving me tat person..honey at the end of the dae i just need u to be ard coz i can honestly sae im really dependent on u now..it comes to a point where i need u to take care of me at all times...honey i really love u ..i really do at times it just hurts...to summarise the whole shitass days..even tho its shitass but still it makes me realise one thing..tat it actually brings us closer ..gives us a new meaning to the relationship...i can sae on my part it kinda makes me grow up..it makes me look at things in a different perspective..it just makes me treasure the relationship even more...n honey at this point of time i really dun want any external factors to affect our relationship..so u freakky peeps out there pls can u guys or gerls just cut us some slack n let us carry on wif our life wif PEACE!!! hey im nt asking too much ok..

P/S: im so in love wif my relationship n NUR SYED JUFRI tat i swear i gonna kill whoever comes in n cause disturbance...trust me i will...pls take note of tat...coz i had enuff of all the shits..big thnks n CHEERS!

2005-12-29T01:18:00.000+08:00

Okay....its been a long time indeed huh....gosh wat 2 daes it has been....

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Gosh sorie for tis really long delay for da nexzt posting bt yeah...nw tat tings are beta.....im finally postin one....*hey time is a factor too ya noe*......

Okay....i cant really sae its been a great two daes for me....n for us.....yeah...we were experience sum problems....*yeah wen i sae sum...its really sum*.....bt da fact of da matter is....da problem did not originate from us at all....*gosh wat else is new rite*.....yeh bt at da end of da dae....we juz gota faced it....as shit as it can be...

Well, faced it we did...da problem was gettin so taxing tat it was wearing both of us down....affecting us phsycologically u mite sae....*Gosh i hate dat feeling....*...suddenly im kinda feeling nice dat we didnt actually fall apart amidst all tis shites......bt i cant sae it didnt worry me to shites....coz honestly honey....i cant nvr see my baby so lost like tat....honey dun let tis world bring u down.....n always remember baby...ur not alone....im here wit u oways....like promised.....for beta or for worse....ive been there wit u in times of joy...now dat ur down....i juz want to be dat small comfort zone for you honey.....i love you lots......

Bt hey now that its all almost ova.....n we can get back down wit our lives....i tink tis is much beta definitely....n tis whole situation has juz make us alot more stronger together baby....

I love you baby.....Im juz glad tat its all over....I Love You baby...i really really do alot alot
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Orite....bt no matter hw shitass our daes were....well it was still nutin short on da kinky part.....*sumtin dat amaze me alot....* no matter hw shit we feel...we juz cant get enuff of each otha n juz want each otha all da time.....

Hmmmmm.....honey y must u be so ur yummy???

N Y DOES IT ALWAYS HAF TO BE SO ANTI CLIMATIC!!!!GET DA KIDS OUTA DA PICTURE!!!

Inilah sebtol nye KJ*!

Bt heck im not complainin.....i still enjoy every moment of it.....coz its all kinky......over da top kinkiness??hehehehe.........

At da end of da dae....i love you so much la baby....n at times ilove you bt i want u more....heheheh.....u noe wat i mean.....kinky!

*KJ- Kisah Juboh*

;)

2005-12-26T03:01:00.000+08:00

Wooh....wat a dae today....so da wonderful!!!

I cant help it lah....tings are really looking much brigther now for me....so heck....im not gona complain n juz bask in da sun and all tis good stuff!!!weeeeeee.....

First of all MeRRY Christmas Everyone!Merry Christmas baby!!hehehe....Tis is one christmas im not gona forget at all!!Its so nice....first we thrashed da living shit of Tenchi FC n ma goalscoring run continued...all together 11*weeeeee cum feb i want dat golden boot award* bt tats not da best.....

Da best part of da dae has to be da whole xchanging of chocs event....it was da most wonderful ting ever...i mean hu doesnt love choc...bt haf u evr shared choc wit ur love one???*n i dun mean chocs like kit kat okay*...K da plan was dat i and my baby wud surprise each otha n buy chocs for one anotha...den xchanging it....*in da process sharing da chocs*.....so i got mine from Chocolate Box....n hers from Chocolate Arts....n u noe wat....both our boxes of chocs....were almost similar...wat i haf in ma box...she has in hers...*well cant help it lah...we tink alike...no joke*........it was really nice....xchanging da whole chocolate...at CCK Park...woo.....wonderful...n da choc were yummy....bt we concluded sumtin....da chocs dat we bought from JB were da best....*Hey Dun look down on JB okay....hahaha*....

Well.....finally...we touched dat stage...one whole month together...n my god dun time flies....its been really wonderful one month i gota sae...sumtin even unmatchable by any otha relationship...im dead certain on that....wow....im still so speechless afta one month juz tinkin on how to describe tis relationship...*so many good words until dunoe wat to sae*i love tis relationship....bt i love u more baby...hehehe....wow...cant wait for later...it will be quick...cant wait to give u my surprise!!heheh...hope u will enjoy later...hehehe...

I love you my princess!!! Saye Sayang awak tau Mrs Nur Syed Jufri!!!

2005-12-25T16:21:00.000+08:00

merry xmas everyone...yeah christmas is finally here..n guys the best thing is..
we r just one dae away frm 26 nov 2005....cant wait to get tat chocs..finally i can get tat chocs..hehehe
most importantly i cant wait to share tat chocs wif tat special someone....i am missing him so much tat it hurts..no joke bout it...i`ve grown so attached to him ...i cant go thru a dae without thinking of him..n yes im nt afraid to say it out tat i am totally dependent on him...i need him to be ard me always...darn....i am missing him at this very moment..honey i miss ya a lot u knw...but heck i will see him tonite..its just few hours away..i can i can i can...yeah i can breeze thru..i think so lah..hehehe...honey honey i love u so much u knw..i cant help it...he means a lot to me...it has always been like tat..whether during our frenship stage or our present state now..he is such a dear to me....i just cant afford to lose him..n yeah talking bt tat it reminds me of the time when he went missing in action..dear tat is so not funny...arrggghhh!!!!!hate tat feeling a lot..I HATE THAT!!!IT SUCKS BIG TIME!!!! just thinking of tat alone make me realise one thing..tat i really need him ard always at all times..n at tat moment too i finally realise tat i dun treat him as a normal platonic guy fren..i swear it was indeed much more than tat..the feelings for him has always been there ...i guess i was trying to be ignorant bout the whole thing coz i wasnt prepared to risk our frenship..n boy the whole process of our frenship-relationship stage is all good...damn good..when i say its all good ..trust me its really good..but then i dun think u guys would undastand aniway..hahaha...

at the end of the dae..im just lucky to have someone like him..who appreciates me for who i am tho i knw tat i do drive him nuts whenever im in my BLUR mood...hehe..but honey im just being myself u knw!! but the most important thing in our relationship he showers me wif so much attention without me asking ..im very grateful for all tat...honey honey..i wanna be ur princess forever k..can ?can ?can? hehehe...done blogging..will update more tmr..hehe..watch out for tat space...love ya bnyk bnyk nice..

2005-12-25T01:42:00.000+08:00

You're one in a million
Oh
NowYou're one in a million
Oh

Sometimes love can hit you every day
Sometimes you can fall for everyone you see
But only one can really make me stay
A sign from the skySaid to me

[Chorus]
You're one in a million
You're once in a lifetime
You made me discover one of the stars above us
You're one in a million
You're once in a lifetime
You made me discover one of the stars above us

I've been looking for that special one
And I've been searching for someone to give my love
And when I thought that all the hope was gone
A smile, there you were and I was gone
I always will remember how I felt that day
A feeling indescribable to me
Yeah
I always knew there was an answer for my prayer
And you, you're the one for me

[Chorus x 2]
In the beginning I was cool and everything was possible
They tried to catch me but it was impossible
No one could hurt me it was my game
Until I met you baby and you were the same
And when you didn't want me
I wanted you because
The funny thing about it is I liked the show
I like it when its difficult
I like it when its hard
Then you know its worth it
That you found your heart

[Chorus x 2]
You're one in a million
Oh
You're one in a million

*you are indeed one in a million......i love you darlin....one more dae!*

2005-12-24T18:56:00.000+08:00

A dae away now....from christmas....n two daes away from tat big bangin deas.....wow.....honestly ive never been tis anxious tis excited....so overwhelmed by all tis feelings....i never tot tat there wud finally be sumone who can make me feel like this.....for once in my life....i feel so blessed.....so very blessed....n appreciated...

N once n for all.....u banished those bad memories of mine....n each dae for me.....can never be more wonderful.....N honestly rite now.....i juz haf to tell da whole world...everyone out there....I LOVE YOU MY BABY....so very much....

U made a whole lot of difference ever since u walked into ma life....may it wen we were frens....or as we are now...my life cudnt haf been more wonderful wit you ard...Suddenly da sun is shining brighter and even da rain cant dampen ma spirit....tings will never be da same again baby...U ARE MY EVERYTING.....n baby....i appreciate every single ting u have done for me n for us in tis relationship dearie....

N at tis stage of my life....our lives....i can never be so certain about da future...Tis path tat is set in front of us....Will be da most wonderful path that we will ever set foot on....together....So many great tings lay in front of us baby...remember our 2006 wishlist??hehehe.....i noe we can get there baby....be it da short future of 2006 or be it da year whr we set on to anotha path 5 years down da road....i noe....we can fulfilled wat we'r here for.....so lets go get it rite honey.....n i promise you....u'll not gona walk tis path alone.....coz from now on baby....u'll never be alone....tat i promise you.....coz i love you so very much.....

*Yeah.....i need you becoz i love you not i love you becoz i need you.....I love you baby*

2005-12-24T13:04:00.000+08:00

i can i can i can....yeah gotta tell myself i can breeze thru todae...AAARRRGGHHHH!!!!!!
but still its killing me...after 2 great daes of quality time together its just hard to to go thru
the dae alone...went to see the chocs again at tat shop..hehehe..the chocs look really yummy..
i really hope it taste as yummy as it looks too..coz i haven tried those chocs b4..tats the reason
y i decided to buy the chocs there..so we can like taste it together for the very first time..
u super duper yummylicious chocs..u better taste great if nt u gonna ruin the whole atmosphere tmr
when im feeding him..

when christmas is over..the big banging dae is cumin..i really cant wait..i cant contain my excitement..
gotta admit to tat..without any doubt,i bet wif my last dollar tat he gonna make it
a very sweet n memorable one..i trust him..hes always full of ideas when it comes to this stuffs..
n i still dun hav the slightest idea where hes bringing me on tat dae..hmmmffff...!!!!!honey honey y cant u just tell me??
its been a great mnth together..like he says the other time..`tis relationship has always been been bout quality n not quantity`..i have to agree wif tat ..n tis time ard i can finally tell myself tat i have found the rite one..tat im certain where we r heading..tat im done looking..tat i dun need any source of distractions elsewhere..tat whatever effort i put in its all been worthwhile..tat im not wasting time wondering whether am i making the rite decision..wow!!!way to go gerl...! gv urself a pat on the shoulders..

i just cant explain the feelings into words..but im really grateful for all this

he took me out frm the dark corner where empty hopes n promises been made,
n lead me to a road where i can finally see the sunlight..n for tat aspect
im really blessed..thnks a lot dearie..it really means a lot to me..

***i need u in this life becoz i love u n not i love u becoz i need u***

2005-12-24T00:32:00.000+08:00

Wah damn....so many daes never do ani postin.....*ok ok i noe im xagerratin...its only 2 daes*

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Honey honey.....u KINKY KINKY KINKY little one!....gosh.....if i cud....really wud haf...........*hmmmmm....lets not go there......*

Gosh its been a really wonderfully sweet 2 daes rite baby?hehehe.....*not forgettin kinky*...Yest, was absolutely cool n sweet rite.....Finally......a BREAKFAST DATE!!!n hw many of u ppl un tis world can actualli sae tat u drag urself outta bed in da morn juz to do a small simple ting like havin breakfast wit ya love one hur hur hur....heheheheh....only us...thus da name....Singapore Sweetheart....hehehehe

Yup it was a nice sweet breakfast(tanks LJS)...n yeah honey....i noe u always always always luff our asses off wen we'r together but i wud never never ever can forget that luffter....such a sweet giggle...in da morn at 915am??hehehehe....n yeah can never forget tis too...."ok ok i go mandi now"...so semangat mangat!hehehehe....

After breakfast was hell.........wat else.....SOFA TIME Duhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......*Due to sensual happenings on da sofa....details cant be disclose into da open*....heck....bt it was kinky.......

N yeah....last nite....we had a very yummy family dinner.....it was really nice u noe honey....to haf a dinner wit ya family in da comfort of ur own home....hehehe.....i feel like im part of tis family oready!!!!!wow.....such a wonderful experience.....da tulang was yummy.....so was da kuay teow...bt ade sikit nye pedas la....

N today.....wat can i sae honey....we were so....passionate in doin wat we do best.....dear....i still gota ask u tis....y must u be so yummy???n yeah da wae u go onto ma neck...is so so so so yummy.....*ok ok i cant go on animore.....*Yeah i haf to agree wit you...I love you...bt juz now...I WANT YOU!!!!!!gosh u really really on da switches......N today is by far da most kinkiest dae ever....agreed??hehehehe....*to be continued*cant help it lah baby.....ur so sweet so cute....yet so sexay wen u look all messed up....so yummmy!!!!!!!!!

Hey today we oso got our photo album....hehehehe.....tats really sweet n yeah....like ma new hairdo???hahhahahaha.....okay i noe i sudnt be so vain....hehehehe......i cant wait ot print all those picts baby.....i love em'.....hehehehe....yeah we really look nice together huh.....so nice......so cute....

Well baby,,,,we'r a dae away from christmas and 2 daes away from our anniversary.....I cant wait for da whole ting honey.....exchanging chocolates.....den gifts.....*haha u still dun noe mine*
Hu wud haf actuali gone thru all tis rite baby....tats wat make tis relationship special.....so many small simple sweet stuffs do go a long wae....i love all tis....n baby...ur worth every effort i put in tis relationship baby....n yeah...at da end of da dae....i juz wana u to noe i love you so very much....n yeah....5 years down da road....dum dum dadum....dum dum dadum!!!hehehehe.....

*I LOVE YOU BABY!!!!*

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To all the ladies in the dance
I lose all control when I see you
Standing there in front of me
Your style, your clothes, your hair
You fair woman, you look so sexy
The way you wine and, the way you dance
And the way that you twist and turn your waist
Leaves me wanting, leaves me yearning
Leaves me feeling for a taste

[Chorus]
Before the end of the night
I wanna hold you so tight
You know I want you so much
And I'm so tempted to touch
Tempted to touch, tempted to touch
Little woman, man I need you so much
Tempted to touch, tempted to touch
Little woman, man I'm inside your clutch

Tempted to touch, tempted to touch
Little woman, man I need you so much
Tempted to touch, tempted to touch
Little woman, man I'm inside your clutch

To all the ladies in the dance
I don't even know your name
Little woman I don't even know your age
But there's something about you girl
When I see you wining in front the stage
Please forgive me, please excuse me
But there's nothing else that a man can do
I cannot pass or think a woman
I just need to be next to you

[Chorus]

I wanna feel you, I wanna squeeze you
I wanna hug and kiss and caress you
I wanna love you, I wanna touch you
I'll place no one else above you
I wanna feel you, I wanna squeeze you
I wanna touch and kiss and caress you
I wanna love you, I wanna hug you
You know woman
I wanna wings of a dove you

[Chorus]

*Tis is da song....enuff said abt us being kinky...tis song will tell ya everytin*

2005-12-20T22:03:00.000+08:00

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove

And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

*Honey juz listenin to tis song juz tell me how lost i am in you....im so lost in your love...u fill my life wit so much love honey n im tankful for tat dearie.....i love you so so so much!!!Muackzzzzz*

2005-12-20T21:09:00.000+08:00

Look into my eyes, you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart, search your soul
And when you find me there, you'll search no more
Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for

You know it's true
Everything I do, I do it for you

Look into your heart, you will find
There's nothing there to hide
Take me as I am, take my life
I would give it all,
I would sacrifice
Don't tell me it's not worth fighting for
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more

You know it's true
Everything I do,
I do it for you, oooh yeah

There's no love like your love
And no other could give more love
There's nowhere unless you're there
All the time, all the way, yeah

Look into your heart, baby

Hey Oh yeah

Oh, you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more
Yeah, I would fight for you,
I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you, yeah,
I'd die for you

You know it's trueEverything I do
Oooh, I do it for you
Everything I do, darling
I will see you through
I will see you through
Oh yeahYEAH!

Got your heart
You can't tell me it ain't worth dyin' for
Oh yeah I'll be there
I'd walk the wire
I'd die for you

Oooh yeah
One more time
I'm goin' all the way, all the way, yeah I'll be there
Oooh yeah
Oh

*Hehehe....cant help it....was downloading sum songs...happen to stumble on tis....hmmmmm nice rite honey...yeah.....EVERYTIN I DO, I DO IT FOR YOU*i love you MUnchkinz!!!!!

2005-12-20T21:00:00.000+08:00

Hey baby....hehehe....i noe ur bored at work...i cant help it too.....i miss u so mucie muchie u noe....so heres a little sumtin for ya....i hope u like it bAby!!! I LOVE YOU BUSHUK BUSHUK!

I love when we kiss
The touch of your lips
I love the way you walk
Also the way you talk

I love your sexy smile
Your crazy style
I love being with you at the mall
N wen im with you da world seems so small

I love everything about you
Its all real and so true
I love when we are together
I think that feeling cant get no better

I so love your attitude
I dont even think
I can get mad at you
I love your skin against mine
It will happen in a matter of time

I love you so much baby

*I asked God for a minute.
He gave me a day
I asked God for a flower.
He gave me a bouquet
I asked Him for true love.
He gave me that too
I asked God for an angel and He gave me you!*

Ur my angel baby!!!!!Muackzz!!!!I cant wait to see you tmrw~

*6 daes n still counting!*

2005-12-20T16:06:00.000+08:00

hey dearie,due to the boredom of work n the dae itself..
i scribble a lil something for u..hahaha..i do hope u like it tho..

~i wouldnt ask for the world

y should i aniway?

when i`ve got the world at my feet

the minute i found u..

a place where i can hide n seek solace

when all seems too harsh outside

i am just being me...

i am in love..

if being wit u was a risk

i was willing to take it..

there is a reason why we r

meant to cross paths..

there is a reason why we r

here at this very moment

coz our future looks better together

than the past..

again im just being me

i am still in love

you have been my best friend

and now you r my lover

i know in my heart..

i can depend on no other except u

n baby...

i would never trade you for

anything else in this world..

once again im still being me

i will always be in love with u

every single new day..

till end of time...

till forever....~

P/S: dear peeps never underestimate the boredness of the dae

coz at times it does makes wonder for us..hahaha

n dearie honey i so love u muchy much n bnyk bnyk nice...mizz ya lots too baby..

CHEERS!!!

2005-12-20T02:05:00.000+08:00

When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we'll see
No, I won't be afraid
No, I won't be afraid
Just as long as you stand
Stand by me

So darling, darling, stand by me,oh, stand by me oh, stand,stand by me stand by me
If the sky that we look upon
should tumble and fal
lor the mountains should crumble in the sea
I won't cry, I won't cry,No,
I won't shed a tear
Just as long as you stand
Stand by me
So darling, darling, stand by me,oh, stand by me oh,
stand by me,stand by me

2005-12-19T03:44:00.000+08:00

Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what's within and I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you

Some people search for a fountain
Promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
No one to share, no one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you

Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby

Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you
If I ain't got you with me baby

Said nothing in this whole world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby

*Honey...tis song reflects how i feel for ya always baby... I love you snoogums!*

2005-12-19T03:27:00.000+08:00

Today by far....i have to sae.....is one of da best daes ever honey....hu wud haf tot we wud eventually end up at IKEA!!!.....hahaha....we are really behavin like a married couple huh.....I LOIKE!hehehehe....bt tats really nice honey...to go thru all those furniture and sofa*hmmmmm tat red one...is super kinky...good for us*....give us a ruff idea of wat to get in da future i guesss??hehehehehe....cant help it.....i absolutely love that...

N u noe wat honey....tonites dinner....was oso da sweetest one ever....i mean....theres juz u n me....n a plate of yummy pasta*Seafood Marinara(cream sauce)* and pizza!!!gosh....tat was really a super yummy meal n exceptionally sweet....ooohhhhh.....*okay i noe...dun get to emotional*.....two ppl sharing a plate of yummy pasta....one feeding one peeling*prawns la duh....alamak!dun worry honey...frm nw on tat will be all me*....Well it was a short but sweet "outing" i guess....heck.....ITS DA BEST!!!....*okay for those of u hu tinks tis is da end. of our plans...sorie gang...theres many more to cum....look out 2006* bt for da forseeable future....mark tis daes down 25th n 26th.....wow weeeeeee!!!!i cant help it baby....i cant wait for this two daes dearie....it'll be so wonderful baby!.....

Oh yeah baby.....i noe i haven answer that kinky question of yours....well da answer is "yup i havent gone ALL OVA yet" hehehehhee....nyum nyum!!!!!!

I Love You Baby!!!!So muchie Muchie!!!!!!!Muackzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!

2005-12-19T02:47:00.000+08:00

IkEA outing!!!!! hehehehehehe

overall its a great dae todae tho its short sweet n simple..but heck bottomline as long
as we enjoy each otha company..evrything else is just secondary...

n yeah todae is his first time ever having a shower over at my place (but guys sorie im nt wit him in the shower..well oh well ...lets just focus on this n dun try to switch on my kinky mood...honey u knw wat i mean!!!) then its time for us to head down to IKEA ( but wait a min tat is after him smelling me..hehehe)

IKEA is fantastic...has always been one of my fav place..n yeah lucky for me my dearie honey enjoys going there as well..talking bt same wavelength? there u have it..hahaha..hmmm...we in IKEA? it mite kinda sound funny to some but heck we love tat place...n honey tat red sofa? shall we have that? more sofa time together? can we..can we? pls pls pls? hehehe...i really enjoy our sofa time together u knw...i cant help it lah..*Abe sedap!nak buat pe?* the kitchen area? the one wit the old english country theme..nice isnt it? imagine us there...u doing the cookin there just for me..so sweet but then again i wonder if u really can concentrate on the cookin if im there beside u..coz as u knw there will be diverted attention most of the time..remember ( movie ke maner..orang ke maner?) got tat? point proven!!!hehehe..but honey do u realise one thing? we didnt actually look thru the bedroom section...hmmm...nvm shall do tat next time k...bedroom? bedroom? did i just say bedroom? ok ok i knw...lets just stop there k..but then again i cant coz after all like u said `i do have a kinky brain` hehe...btw honey i really love our kinky moments..

dinner tonite absolutely fantastic...lovely..yummy..sweet...fabolous...i mean its kinda of an impromptu decision to have pasta n pizza..coz we were actually thinkin of having chicken..chicken breasts for ya honey munchkinz?? honey will ya do tat for me all the time..peeling prawns for me each time we hav seafood..n me doin the feeding all the time..is tat ok? funky enuff for ya? i just love feedin ya..n honey i knw i am super yummy..yummy to the point where u actually bit my finger when im feeding ya pizza!! wad the heck?!! but hey its nt tat im complainin coz its kinda cute i guess..after all u wont call me yummy for nothing rite honey munchkinz?hehehe ok ok i knw..saye tak nak eksyen lah k cik badol..

MAJOR HIGHLIGHT OF THE OUTING!

well we cant call the nite quits if we dun have our kinky moments..(but get this straight i knw we r always kinky n stuff but tat does nt mean we r horny k..)hahaha...sensual is the best word to describe the kinky moments of ours..oooohhhh btw i totally adores each time he leaves me all wet n sticky..(guys go figure tat out but im pretty sure ur definition of the concept is all wrong..) n honey the `lickin all ova part` i still have to sae this..its just partial..pls go way dwn from tat nx time k..ooopsss!! hahaha..but still just nw is good enuff as for now..soft? hehehe..u like it like tat dearie honey? u r just so yummy n i have to sae this ..u r one damn great kisser..cant help it since u r frm JUFRI SCHOOL OF KISSING!!..n honey u totally drives me up da wall..trust me u really do..hehehe...
i really love tonite dear..i just love bein ard u..but heck i knw im goin to enjoy myself more nx coming mondae..hehehe..u knw wat i mean!! hur hur hur...

*P/S: I`ve never felt like this before i`m loving every minute of it don`t stop You are all I ever want*

honey muchkinz u r all i ever want..i really dont want anyone else..coz there is just no one else who can love me better than u do..i love ya lots honey..i really do..i am so super in love wit ya..

i am in love wit ya
i am in love wit our relationship
i am in love wit us...

PS: 7 more days to go..weeeee!! cant wait

2005-12-18T00:39:00.000+08:00

Our Words of Wisdom?

-----------------------------
Words:

Cool ~ It was once our most favourite word...that was den...hehe
Cool Bananz ~ Modification and upgradin done to da word COOL...
Funky ~ Our first most over used word...Gosh it was so addictive ur mama used it honey!hehehehe...
Crazy ~ Wat ppl describe us as...true...no doubt abt it...
Kinky ~ Oooh...i absolutely love tis word....Describe wat we love to do!!!Sofa time??
Nyum Nyum ~ Okay for those of u hu actually really wondered all along tis word means...gosh...it describes da feeling wen we kizz...or sumtin that taste nice.....like....Lips(Hers) & Tongue Stud(Mine)
Malau ~ Wen u add malas n lemau together

Phrases:

I love you ~ Of coz...its in every sms....my gosh...hehehehe....
Marky Mark n Da Funky Bunch ~ Hmmmm.......
"Da party was Great!" ~ I noe u love it dearie!
Banyak banyak nice ~ Okay dun ask me where she got tis from okay...ask her....hehehe
Idiot buffalo shit! ~ Okay tat juz pops out from me last nite...
Jesus Shit! ~ Anotha one of my crap...
Awak nie pon Cik Bedah/Cik Badol ~ Hark!hehhehehe.....
"Janganlah begitu...." ~ Yeah u like me being P Ramlee or Ramli Burger??

Our Variations Of "I Love Yous'"

I love you dear
I love you darlin
I love you honey
I love you Sweetie
I love you munchkinz
I love you mommu
I love you Snoogum Boogums
I love baby Snoogum
I love you Baby Bushuk Bushuk
I love you lah....*Dun ask me*
I love you mann....*Really cool*
I love you mike!....*Okay ur addicted to Guna*

*Yeah we got many variations....many waes to do it u noe!Sorie copyrighted*

2005-12-17T14:47:00.000+08:00

Hey....finally.......we finally completed it all....

Lets Haf a run down...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Things To Do When We Finally Meet Up:*Tis was den okay*
---------------------------------------------------------

1)Haf Ben n Jerry's ~ Checked! *Chunky Monkey/Choc Chip Cookie Dough/Choc Fudge...Nyum nyum*
2)Stargazing ~ Checked!*Unda da coconut tree*
3)Hugs ~ Checked!*Lotsa of it!*
4)Kizzez ~ Checked!*So nyummy nyummy...Irresistable*
5)Pinch her dimply cheeks ~ Checked!* It was so great...ooopss!*

n den yeah of coz....finally today..... item no.6!>>>

Our Kaya N Roti Date!
-------------------------------

Well not a date actualli...bt heck....there was kaya..there was roti...there was u....n there was me...weeeee!!!....yeah i cant help it la...its really nice to send u to work..hehehe...kinda cool...FUNKY!

Well....bt wat make tis date one of those dates you will nvr forget is juz....to wake up...n juz seeing u smile honey in da morning...n to be able to finally sae GOOD MORNING straight outa my mouth.....it feels so great!!!n to top it all off....ur beautiful smile....tats y i oways sing that song to you...u noe... *I'VE GOT SUNSHINE, ON A CLOUDY DAE".....Coz baby....ur MY SUNSHINE.....EVERYDAY.....I LOVE YA LOTS BABY SNOOGUMS!!!!MUACKZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!

:)

2005-12-17T00:23:00.000+08:00

Yesh ah!!!!Finally.....our very own....completed blog with a nice sweet background..........ok almost coz still lacking on da picts....heck.....tis is still nice!

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well...oh well....its been two daes since tis blog is up....dunoe hws da response bt one tings for sure...we'r lovin this....

Its been a cool two daes i gota sae.....altho we didnt do much...we did talk alot n got sum stuff of our chest i guess....rite honey??hehehehe....i love last nite honestly...n ive cum to the conclusion that Marina Centre.....da place where we had our first date...heheheh....is da very best place to talk coz its juz so productive there...hehehehe....*hey productive doesnt mean making babies okay*

Honey dear....i really love hw tings are going between us n yeah, the year 2006.....will be beta im sure...juz look at our *not finished* wishlist....it juz keeps growing n growing n growing....*heck hu saes im complaining!!!heheheheh*

Yeah...n let da countdown begins....its a 9 DAES now before we celebrate our big banging anniversary!!!woo hoo.....i cant wait honey....well hu can?back to back celebrations...Christmas den anniversary....gosh...n look wat we've got plan on both daes....Chocs?Gifts?.....damn u idiots reading shud be envious....*ooopssss...sorie i mean frens hu are reading tis*...
n yeah...considering now we not only starting all tis stuffs n cant get off each other...hahahaha....*okay i noe i noe*....its juz me...hehehehe....we'r even gettin da same tings....bling blings???hehehehe....*Sehati Sejiwa betol*

Well honey....at da end of da dae dearie....im lovin tis relationship so very much...n im lovin you too....so so much....Banyak banyak nice dearie!!!hehehee.......Lets stay together orite baby snoogums....n enjoy tis journey till tat dae >>>> 26/11/2011!heheheh....coz its....dum dum dadum....dum dum dadum.....dum dum dadum dum dadum dum dadum...hehehehe..... hur hur hur...... :)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I noe i oways sing tis song to u....n its even on frenster...bt heck....i love singing it to you snoogums!n yeah...i'll sing on 26/11/10 too....n by deni get da lyrics...full!heheheh...;)

I've got sunshine on a cloudy day.
When it's cold outside I've got the month of May.
I guess you'd say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).

I've got so much honey the bees envy me.
I've got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees.
I guess you'd say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).

Hey hey hey Hey hey hey Ooooh.

I don't need no money,
fortune, or fame.
I've got all the riches baby one man can claim.
I guess you'd say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin' 'bout my girl (my girl).
I've got sunshine on a cloudy day with my girl.
I've even got the month of May with my girl (fade)

2005-12-14T15:16:00.000+08:00

I would give up ev'rything
Before I'd separate myself from you
After so much suffering
I fin'ly found unvarnished truth
I was all by myself for the longest time
So cold inside
And the hurt from the heartache would not subside
I felt like dyingUntil you saved my life

Thank God I found you
I was lost without you
My ev'ry wish and ev'ry dream
Somehow became reality
When you brought the sunlight
Completed my whole life
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
'Cause, baby, I'm so thankful I found you

I will give you ev'rything
There's nothing in this world
I wouldn't doTo ensure your happiness
I cherish ev'ry part of you
'Cause, without you beside me,
I can't surive Don't want to try
I'f you're keeping me warm each and ev'ry night
I'll be all right
'Cause I need you in my life

See, I was so desolate
Before you came to me
Looking back, I guessIt shows that we were destined to shine
After the rain to appreciate
The gift of what we have
And I'd go through it all over again
To be able to feel this way

Thank God I found you
I was lost without you
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
My baby, I'm so thankful I found you
I'm overwhelmed with gratitude
My baby,I`m so thankful I found you

*honey munchkinz i know u know this song...but i cant help it..this song is specially for u..
this song reflects the way i feel bt ya honey..n dearie i love tis song so much tat i want it to be the theme of our song in lets say that one final journey in bt 5-6 yrs time? i hope u know wat i mean darling..hur hur hur...*

2005-12-14T14:40:00.000+08:00

honey munchkinz...i am really in love wit ya u know..n i still cant believe tat we hav so much happy n sweet moments together...be it the days before 26 nov 2005 n the present us now..i love every single bit of it..actually rite i still cant figure out how we can end up like this..so into each otha,cant get enuff of each otha n heck who cares rite..

darling u really make my life complete..those nites `discovering each other inner self` thru a third party which is that small lil screen.yeah got to gv credit fot tat damn thing tho it always dies on us at the wrong time..eg..remember when i actully speak GERMAN to ya in the middle of the conversation..DARN!!! i am still in love wit those late nites coz without tat we wouldnt even come close to this munchkinz..it really places a great significance for me personally..the things we shared together thru those nites is just so unbelievably amazing n boy we do have lots in common..n when that one big dae actually comes rite smacking at my face tho i was so DAMN BLUR at that moment..i still cant grasp the fact that u r actually rite there in front of me..the BRATMAn tat i know ..the person who can actually makes me smile after every single conversation b4 bed time..yeah cant believe tat ..tat explains the moments of *jeling menjeling* honey..i was just downrite speechless..but hey not animore coz u r really here wit me now ...n honey i really want u to be there for me in every single step ...i dun even want any of this to end coz i just cant see myself being sane without u ard...so pls be as crazy as u r now n drives me nuts for all u want coz thats the way i want it to be..u driving me so nuts ..

*I LOVE YOU MANN!!!*

2005-12-14T00:50:00.000+08:00

Hahahaha.....first blog eva.....cant believe we got a shared blog honey.....
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k...FIRST TINGS FIRST......

*Warning:
If u happen to stumble upon tis blog coz ur tryin to read up on sumones sex life...sorie not gona happen here....N if ur single, worst still coz da contents of tis blog wud be such a major turn off to singles that u mite juz haf a stroke n die in ur damn chair.....

For frens hu too happen to stumble upon tis site....or made known abt it.....do enjoy till ur eyes turn red....be envious...be jealous....be crazy.....bt pls....be happy for us....hahahahaha

For da rest....keep ur comments to urself....

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Well......Finally.....Da story itself....*well honey....i noe u wud be readin tis....hehehe...im takin tis time off....to recap...n enjoy tis beautiful two wks tat we've had together*....

N da story goes............

Dat morn....dat very morn wen i woke up....on da 26th November 2005...*a dae tat we both will nvr forget*....i woke up wit tis questions in my mind..."can i wait tat long?do i haf to wait tat long?nw tat i haf a chance wit her y wait?"....hmmm....wait i didnt....n god noes whr i got da BALLS to ask u out dat nite munckinz....

"Dat dae is todae dear"
N hu wudnt remember tat rite baby??hehehhe....gosh.....u were really dat blur huh??...hahaha....n boy wat a nite it was....there were ice cream...*damn i still hate 7-11 for not giving us sudu kayu u noe*...bt most importantly...there was da person ive been wantin to haf ice cream wit...My Ms Dimple Wimple...up close...n very personal...*u noe wat i mean*....herhehehe.....We shared da ice cream...we tok alot....n of coz...we shared tat very most wonderful memory tat i wud keep forever....unda da dark sky wit lotsa stars..n a coconut tree...dat all wonderful first kiss....*u got yummy lipz....*...hmmm dun dat sound familiar....u really do....n dat nite...i juz didnt want it to end....n from den on....tings juz got beta...

Ova da week....well i wudnt even dare sae tings escalated....coz tats an undastatement...hehehe...gerl i was enjoyin every single minute of my life frm den on....wit you....u brought a whole different meaning to da word love...n yeah....i was lovin every minute of da relationship...n i was loving you lots n lots n ...lots....more every minute...every sec....n yeah....remember honey....wen we walked ard in Orchard like headless chicken tryin to catch Chicken little...hahahaha....funky....bt eventually without ani regret or wateva...i gladly sae we watched a great movie as a replacement.....imagine tis....a GoreFest movie like SAW 2....for a romantic real First Date...hahahah....absolutely funky!

P/s: Tat was on da same dae we found....Marky Mark....hmmm.....

Den da following week....well honey....one word to describe tat week.....KINKY.....really kinky....da week tat saw anotha side of us....Kinky....absolutely kinky...hahahaha....n tis week too...itss extra romantic....with all those plans honey....remember honey....e home, e gown,e sofa,e storeroom full of snacks, e growing old...n u noe wat....we went back to tat very first place we sat...Marina Centre...hw nice....banyak banyak nice u noe...hehehhe....
N gerl was it a kinky week....nyum nyum all ova....n yeah....believe me....U really do taste like vanilla ice cream honey....Choc sauce on ya madame?*yes please!*.....oooppppppsssssss....noti noti! ;)Cant help it...u really do drive me up da wall....

N yeah....we finally caught up wit dat damn cute CHicken Little....great movie~!
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Well honey....no matter wat dae is it in da week....which eva month....I STILL LOVE YOU just as much!no doubt abt it....*no matter wat they sae*hehehehe.....N yeah honey....u wud forever be my baby snoogums bushuk bushuk!
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Da final ting Baby Snoogums...I noe u noe tis song...bt im still gona give it to ya...coz it reflects...US! I love You sho very much honey!

Ohhh.. Oh Oh..
I don't wanna go another day
So I'm telling you, exactly what is on my mind
Seems as like everybody is breaking upand throwing their love away
But I know I got a good thing right here
That's why I say (Hey)
Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u

I don't wanna go another day
So I'm telling you, exactly what is on my mind
See the way we ride, in our private lives
Ain't nobody gettin' in between
I want you to know that, your the only one for me
Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u

And now, ain't nothing else I can need
And now, I'm singing.. 'cause your so, so into me
I got you, we'll be making love endlessly
I'm with you, baby you're with me
So don't cha worry aboutpeople hanging around
they ain't bring us down
I know you, and you know meand that's why, that's why I say

Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u
Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u